Friday, September 30, 2005

Luck...or lack there of

I am not kidding you. My LF has fallen into the biggest pile of luck you ever did see. That chick is into buying the scratch off cards from your local convenience store. I am not joking when I say she's got luck. In the past month, she's won almost a thousand dollars playing those things. I hate to even answer the phone when she calls because I just know she's going to tell me she's won another wad of cash. I personally don't buy them. It's a leftover from how I was raised. I let Fred do it instead. Cat Daddy knows how to do all that and I'm too afraid I would take it personally if I didn't win. This way...if he buys the winning ticket, I am SOOO going shopping in my new Land Rover and if he doesn't? Eh, oh well.

So, I'm moaning and groaning about her luck and she tells me she's hitting while the hitting's good because it won't last forever. At least she got her car insurance paid and stuff.

Today I open our mail. And there's this letter. It informs my hubby that an allotment he had going to this obscure bank in the middle of nowhere has some money sitting in it. I bout crapped. 800 smackeroos, people. Well, thank you Lord, there's my winning scratch off ticket. Santa is going to be so happy this year. So is this how winning the lottery feels? Many of you may scoff at such a paltry sum, but I'm not!! This is sweet sweet sweet and I'm going to enjoy knowing that Christmas is paid for.

And for all of you who say....but, Hope, this is Fred's money. How can you say how it's going to be spent? Kiss my butt. We're in this together and Cat Daddy knows we got 3 kids and big family to think of. He's just as excited as I am.

Speaking of the breadwinner. He's started his midnight shift work. Gotta admit I'm glad I'm not in his shoes. I just hope he doesn't get hooked on Days of Our Lives again since he's off during the day. I'd hate to tie my DVR up with that mess once he's back on days. There are more important things to record! Like Oprah. Degrassi. And every single show on the Disney Channel. Who showed Makenna how to operate that thing??? Jeesh. A kid learns to read and it's all over with, people.

Thursday, September 29, 2005

Tagged...yet again....

Lady Angela has tagged me again for some fun blog festivities. I'm going to participate because it's like throwing a party. You sit and fret and wonder who will show up and you don't rest until some do. Some people don't care, but I'm Southern. We care about parties. And Guests. And dip. So I'm going to play along. I'm just cool that way.

The Rules:1. Go into your archive.2. Find your 23rd post.3. Find the fifth sentence (or closest to).4. Post the text of the sentence in your blog along with these instructions.5. Tag 5 other people to do the same.

Here is my sentence. Makes no sense, man!

So, this morning I told SIL that we needed to hit the water this evening.

Here are my five people that I'm inviting to the party...or tagging:

1. Jacinda
2. Coley
3. Starbldr (this is your chance to get into the blogosphere, shugah!)
4. Fred
5. Mar

Angela, Dahling, the dip was good but I must share one teensy tiny miff with you. Big Bertha never made it over my way.

Wednesday, September 28, 2005

Another Paige-ism

Lawd, I love this kid. She might be hell on wheels and hard to handle sometimes, but her sharp wit will see her through.

This week is "Spirit Week" at her school. Something fun and exciting to do every day. Monday was pajama day. She definately participated in that because, DUH, she got to wear her monkey pj's and they are just sooo cute.

Tuesday was FLASHBACK DAY. Paige didn't participate because she didn't give me any notice and I just have to have time to plan these things out. It was a hit at school. I picked her up from school because she had counselling and all the way there, she told me about the different costumes that were worn. One group got together and did Gilligan's Island. They rocked. There were poodle skirts and ponytails. One group of gals did Flashdance complete with heels and lace socks.

So, Paige talked about it and I simply had to nod once in a while to keep her movtivated. We were pulling up to the front of the office where she goes for counseling and she made this comment:

"Hey, Mom? So we do flashback day and we got lots to choose from, right? Well, if Nana and Papa did flashback day back when they were in high school, who would they dress as? Pilgrams?"

I lost it. And you can bet your sweet fanny I couldn't wait to get home and tell my Mom. Somehow it didn't amuse her as much as it did me.

Saturday, September 24, 2005

Frustration..with some sweetness mixed in

Don't say I didn't warn you. The Navy blah blah blah thing has commenced forth and I'm alone....with 3 kids. With a mother recovering from surgery.

Today was tuff. Capital T-U-F-F. I've been so busy doing other things this week, I had to focus on the house before I got reported to DSS and they came by and cited me for nastiness. Besides, we needed clean underwear, ya know? So, here I go...scrubbing the bathroom floor on my hands and knees. Washing a good 8 loads of laundry (yeah, there's still 2 loads to go). I put off the hands-and-knees deal as long as possible because the back just can't take it. Paige was kind enough to entertain Vitt so I could get it done without "supervision" on his part. Chores were getting done.

I call my mother and ask how she is. Does she need anything? Is there any pain? She proceeds to tell me she is doing super. Then...I get blasted. Apparently she's been waiting for me to go and sit with her and clean her house and do her laundry. Excuse me? You never once indicated to me that you needed all this stuff done! And she says....well, I don't beg should have called. ~Deep breath~ I then tell her that I am no mind-reader and I would be more than happy to do whatever she needs. I just can't go and sit with her all day (People...she's NEXT DOOR for crying out loud!!). I have things that need to be done in my own house and she doesn't want 3 kids tearing her house up. She goes on about how my Dad is doing the laundry and this and that, etc etc. Well, pardon me, but it won't hurt him one bit. Sure, he's worked ...but hasn't she worked for years and come home and done all of that and supper is ready at 6:22 p.m. sharp every single freaking day? I just get off the phone and cry because, once again, I have won the award for World's Worst Daughter.

I proceeded to let Paige go be a teenager...well, in her mind at least. She left this afternoon with a friend and I got that famous phone call at 8 p.m. "Can Paige spend the night?" Sure. Why not? Getting a break where ever I can, folks. I bathe the rest of us who are left and put the Troublefinder to bed. I look and there's my sweet Makenna on the computer, drawing pictures and entertaining herself. Not asking a thing of me. I go to the kitchen and put some cookies in the oven to bake. I then tell her that I never get to just sit and hang with her and I was cooking us a treat. Her eyes got so big. We proceeded to have cookies with a glass of milk...just the two of us. She looks at me and says.."Isn't this just so cool? Thanks, Mama. You're the bestest." Crushed my heart and made me touch the sky at the same time. She's so easygoing. Smooth. Self-sufficient. Low maintenance. I've got to make more time for her. She might end up saving my sanity for me.

Took the kids skating last night as a reward for good grades. Yeah, I'm cool that way. SIL went with hers and we just partied. Today, the girls are so sore from using those couch potato muscles. Can we say "Motrin is our best friend?" Makenna informed me that the motrin, cookie, and milk hit the spot and she felt like she could rest real good.

It was a day of frustration. Because you can't sneeze while you're cutting the grass. Because your small son is riding with you and just when you sneeze and close your eyes, he decides to throw his paci (why does that kid throw EVERYTHING?????) and guess what? Yeah, I ran over it. That and my mom....why it's enough to make a decent person crazy.

Friday, September 23, 2005

Freeze Frame!!!!!

Ok. I know I'm old. I don't need reminders. But, does anyone remember this song??? Reason I ask is because I took the girls skating tonight since they did so awesome on their interim report cards. 'Sides, they don't have school tomorrow and it just seemed like a "Cool Mom" kind of thing to do. I grew up going to a skating rink on a regular basis. My uncle worked at one and my folks liked to go and do their thang. So, it was skate or be bored. It's now been around 5 years since I've been on skates. With this bad back, I wouldn't even think of attempting it.

Anyways, there were some gals there with their kids (SIL went with niece and nephew) that I grew up with. We got to talking about going when we were younger and how old we felt now. I went to get some drinks while the kids skated and when I got back I started doing the intro for the song "Freeze Frame". Everyone started laughing and talking about what that song reminded them of. Ahhh....memories.

The week is getting better. My mom had surgery on her back yesterday. Pinched nerve kind of deal. She did so wonderful, it's just amazing. She rode home with me because she simply couldn't climb into her Tahoe. I stopped to get her something to eat. My dad is going to kill me, but I let her have a sandwich AND a handful of fries. Yes, I know...big no-no for the diabetic. She ate with big lusty sighs and eyes closed. I noticed she had her legs crossed...ankle on opposing knee. I asked her if that was a good idea? She replied....I have hurt for so long. I woke up after this surgery and the tingling was gone in my legs and I just don't hurt. I can do this without crying in pain. I have my stomach full and I think I'm going to rest now. She then proceeded to start snoring. Bless her heart. She's needed no pain killers and told me this morning she was waiting for the truck to hit her and to start hurting. I don't think it will. Bless her.

That Navy blah blah blah thing starts this weekend. I won't see my husband until November. Man, that sucks. It would be different if he were out to sea, but he's not. Yeah, we're leaning towards moving to be together even more. We're getting information on our housing choices now. As of now, we're up for a 2 story townhouse like deal. Can we say "Hello E.R! My name is Vitt and I have stairs in my house?" Oh yeah, the nightmares have started.

Tuesday, September 20, 2005

YaY Hope and Fred

YaY us. It's mine and Fred's 2 year anniversary. What a two year stint it has been. And the phone call at 12:01 a.m. last night was sweet.

I just can't compose some witty, catchy piece today, folks. I am in such a pissy mood that I don't even glance in the mirror when I walk by because I know the expression on my face is one where my mother would say ..."You keep that look and your face will freeze like that and it will be ugly the rest of your life". Yeah yeah yeah, Mom.

I didn't even talk to Fred tonight when he tried to call and barely spoke to him on messenger. Lawd, that's awful of me. (no comment on this please, Fred)

I'll just wrap it all up and know that I did acknowledge my anniversary. It's just another special date that is being missed just about every one this freaking year. Am hushing now.

Hope everyone else is having a better week. Our school is out this Friday and Makenna reminds me of it every five minutes. Oh boy. Gotta get with the entertainment committee this week, I suppose.

Friday, September 16, 2005

Could this be a problem?

I have friends. I love my friends. I have a two very very close friends that I depend on completely and others whom I enjoy their company tremendously. I have a few male friends also. Is that wrong? I likes them lots and enjoy shooting the breeze now and again.

Today I was talking with Des on the phone and told her I was meeting Life Friend and another friend who happens to be male for lunch tomorrow. And I really didn't think anything about it. I tell her how he bought lunch last time and I gave him a kiss on the cheek before he left as a "Thank You". And I really didn't think anything about it. This is second nature for me you see. When starblder brought this wonderful dryer he had "sitting around"....I most certainly hugged his neck and kissed his cheek. And I didn't think anything about it. Well, Des got quiet and I got that icky feeling that she didn't approve. I asked her what was up and she know your brother wouldn't like me doing that. Yeah, so? And I wouldn't want him hugging and kissing on some woman either. What??? Last I recalled, I wasn't exactly mauling these men in public...just expressing sincere affection of friendship. I, of course, told Fred. I tell him everything. Why? Because I don't know how to keep my mouth shut and I'm just that open and honest with him. Always have been. I feel like if you don't do anything you need to hide and just run your mouth telling all your business ..then you're good to go. Finally I shrug (even though she can't see me do this over the phone). I tell her I wouldn't mind Fred hugging or kissing another woman on the cheek. One visit to his family and you become immune within 5 minutes. Those are the kissingest and huggingest people evah. So, it's in his nature to do stuff like that, too.

My question if anyone would like to answer:

If you are a married man/woman, is it okay to hug (friendly hug) and kiss someone on the cheek? Even if your spouse or significant other isn't around? Even if they are? I'm truly curious as to what you folks think on this. Des made me feel almost dirty and it got me a little bit miffed because I truly don't think it's dirty. At all.

p.s. Fred and I are beating the system this weekend and meeting almost halfway between here and Virginia. Goody. A small road trip. By myself with Vitt. Oh yeah, I got the mini dvd player ready to go with Wiggles inside. We're celebrating our anniversary since it'll be 4-7 weeks before we can see each other again. hmmm...gonna be some interesting blogs during that time, huh?

Tuesday, September 13, 2005


We joke in the South that every girl child born is slipped a handbook in the nursery at the hospital. In this sacred handbook, we are taught how to be Southernbelles. How to sip tea without smearing our lipstick. How to have manners and how to use them to our advantage. How to convince boys..then men....that we are helpless and need someone of their manly nature to help "Little ol' Me". There are many many things in this sacred book that cannot be mentioned for fear of reprisal from wiser, more mature Southernbelles. The book is to be detroyed by our sixteenth birthday so as not be accidentally picked up by someone is not serious about being ladylike. Don't get mad at the storyteller here, I am just passing down Southern folklore.

So I have instruction on how to be a lady. A nice handy handbook (that is, of course, destroyed by now because I am wiser and mature (note the lack of the word "old"..major rule giveaway)) to see me through life in this Southeastern United States.

I called my lawyer today. Talked with her right hand woman with whom I grew up with. (rule 37- Always inquire about each other's mothers. I am giving this one away because everyone should do this!) We spoke for about an hour on just what I can do. I can move these girls if I so desire. How about that? I can get reimbursed for all the medical bills of the past 3 years. Can we say Christmas will be sweet? And I can get an increase in support. Well, tighten my knickers..this is getting really really good. She told me this was the easiest win case she had seen in a while and she was ready to "dig in". During the course of the conversation she asked me why had I waited so long? I sighed and responded that divorces didn't come with handbooks. If they did, we women would be much better off. The issue of divorce and all the problems that arise with it make for a surreal life for a while and when you find yourself walking out of courtroom and you realize that you are indeed a free woman again....why, it takes a full six months for it to sink in. I'm not saying it stops you from just muddles the mind for a while.

And raising children. Where are the REAL handbooks? I want to know this, please. How do I handle this preteen ball of hormones who is the size of a small woman and during "that delicate time of the month", I'd put on a mechanical bull in the rowdiest bar around and then tell her to fight her way to the front door and know she would make it with no problems? And Dear Sweet Lord do I stop the eye rolling????? How do I keep refraining from letting my hand fly out and knockin' those eye balls back to the front in proper alignment? And how do I handle being told that I am basically stupid and have absolutely no clue about anything?

And toddlers. How do I keep taking him by the hand and leading him out of the fridge at least 50 times a day? How can I make him understand that it is NOT his personal air condition? How do I keep him out of my brand new top of the line (shout out to starblder! It was a present from him!! smooches shugah) dryer that I treasure because it can dry a load of jeans in 25 minutes flat? How do I make this sweet little man understand that toothpaste is NOT one of the major food groups and should not be consumed by the mouthful?

There are so many situations that a good sturdy handbook would come in handy. I have a bookcase that I am willing to donate shelves to the cause.

Handbooks I am Interested In:
"How to Keep My Sanity When Preteen is Acting like a Froot Loop"

"How to Handle the Most Stubborn, Strong Willed, Temper Tantrum Throwing Toddler This Side of the Mason Dixon Line"

"How to Use Subliminal Messages in Nickelodeon's Shows to Brainwash my 6 Year Old to Pick up After Herself"

"How to Turn Down McDonald's Buy 2 Bacon, Egg, & Cheese Biscuits for $2.00"

I'm so positive that there are more that I am interested in and would love to own. I NEED these books, people. By the way, I do not eat both biscuits. One is for Vitt, he eats the middle out of one. True ladies DO NOT eat two biscuits in one sittin'. It's rude and not classy at all. And if you accuse us of it, be prepared- we will use tears if we have to. It's in our arsenal.

Saturday, September 10, 2005

An Ordinary Day

Paige, at age eleven, thinks she is boss. Of everything. And everyone. The other day she was bossing Makenna around. Ordering her to do this and to do that. Finally, fed up with all the dictatorship, she says to Paige:

"One day you're gonna be old and you're gonna need my help and I'm not gonna give it to you"

Paige had no response. This led me to believe that I needed to be good to Makenna because one day I WILL be old and I WILL need her help and if I've pissed her off too badly at some point and time in her life, she might just hold out on me and not lend a helping hand!

We had a good Southern evening here. The weather is absolutely perfect, folks. I'm talking upper 60' humidity...and there's a hurricane brewing in the Atlantic. What did I tell you? Good weather = catastrophe.
I cut the grass this good evening, and as I cut, I could smell the chickens my Dad was cooking on his back porch. I made a mental note not to tell Fred what we were having to eat because it simply wasn't fair that he's stuck on some halfway done submarine doing duty whilst we enjoyed life. Man, was it good. Perfect even.
After supper we're sitting on the front porch watching the kids play whilst we rocked under the slow moving ceiling fans. My SIL proceeds to tell us that my brother has to go out of town next week for work. He has to fly. He has never flown. I just start laughing. This guy is so safe in his comfort zone, it would take a HUGE stick of dynomite to get him out....or a boss who gives him no choice. She says he asks last night....what am I doing to do? I can't take my knife or my gun with me. (He has a license to tote, friends. He's a by-the-book-kind-of-guy..mostly) She simply looks at him and says: Duck. and RUN. After thinking about it, he says...I AM quick. This is going to be the highlight of my month, I'm sure. He is going to be a freaking basket case about flying and Mr. Tuff Guy would die before he lets it show. Maybe he'll pass out for like a minute. (insert evil grin) I mean, he's just so macho and cool....being brought down a peg would be too sweet for me. I'll never know though, because he'd lie before he'd admit it. Especially to me.

Yes, I've flown. And I hated it. I told my husband that if anyone in his family gets real sick or even tries to die, they need to give us at least 3-4 days notice so we can drive there. I'm not joking. And with the price of gas (paid $2.97 a gallon this morning) as it is...they better be durn serious about being sick or dead.

And I would be completely remiss if I didn't tell you about our new discovery here. We are a Pop Tart family. I like to buy the chocolatey ones so if I am having an incredible craving at night, I can munch on one instead of a candy bar (which I do not purchase to come into my house anyways). They have pulled one over on us, folks. They now have Strawberry Milkshake. Lawd. It's so bad, I have a box hid. The kids are vicious and are like bloodhounds. They can sniff the good stuff out in seconds. You simply must try them. We don't even cook them. They are that good.

And that's the news for today. Nothing spectacular or adrenaline inducing. But I'm to the point in my life that when Fred asks me if anything has happened today....I am thrilled when I can report NO! Let's keep it smooth and easy, people. Mama likes it that way.

Tuesday, September 06, 2005

Time to say Something...Anything....

About this devastation our country is dealing with. I sit here with hands poised above the keyboard and I'm simply stumped.

I've read so many accounts and blogs over the past week. I felt the anger, bitterness, feelings of betrayal. I've seen a sputter of hope flicker and sometimes die a quiet death.

I grieve. I grieve the death of so many people. So many elderly. So So So many babies. My heart aches every time I see a fellow American crying...full of anguish....on my television screen. Paige....who is in that tween self involved stage...rolls her eyes because when coverage comes on, I start to cry. Everytime. She says.....oh Mama, just turn the stupid thing off if it upsets you that badly. She can't understand that just because you turn the t.v. off, it doesn't make it all go away. How sweet it would be if it could. I believe that every single person with any emotion within them will be forever haunted by the images we've seen....the visuals we've gotten from hearing. I, for one, can't get the babies out of my head. Will I ever?

Although I agree with some on how things have been handled...and disagree with some thing is certain. If we don't get past the bullcrap politics of the situation and come together as a nation like our forefathers fought so hard to establish....we're going to lose much more than a historical landmark. Much more than lives unprepared to go so soon. Much more than streets covered in murky sludge.

You figure it out.

Monday, September 05, 2005

Happy Anniversary!!

Happy Anniversary Mom and Dad!!!!!!!

36 Years and STILL going Strong!!!!

How rare am I to have my parents still married and still loving each other? Yes, I know how lucky I am. I can only hope to make it that far in my life.

Just had to recognize two very important people in my life. And no, they don't read the blog because...dang, my mom would leave too many comments and my dad still doesn't know how to turn the computer on and doesn't want to learn.

It has been decided....

The big boy will be staying up past tomorrow's Labor Day. After all that has happened in our beloved South, my brother started thinking. He is one that if WWIII started, we're going to his house. He's totally prepared. I can't give details because then I wouldn't be able to go. 'Nuff said bout that.

ANYWAY. We've decided that hurricane season will not be over for us until October 1. Yes, we know the season lasts through November but history shows us that the worse ones come in September. In fact, we tend to get a little nervous and out of sorts everytime September 1 rolls around. Remember Hurricane Hugo hitting South Carolina? I was living at the beach that summer(round abouts Myrtle Beach)(hold on while I sit and remember a moment........ohhhh, what a summer that was....) Ok, am back. I left to attend college. In one night my whole summer of memories was wiped away. Literally. I go to visit there now once in a while and there is nothing from when I lived there hardly. It is devastating to have memories wiped away like they were never even there.

Jeesh. Back to the story. Due to possible bad weather we are keeping the Big Boy up through September. We may not be able to swim in it, but we will keep it treated and run the pump regularly. We were without power for 6 weeks due to bad weather before. There are 5 children who will need to be cleaned. Our toilets are run by wells. That operate off of electricity. No city water here, folks. We will need water to flush said toilets should the power desert us. Therefore, it is official. The Big Boy will remain to hopefully take care of us should the need arise.

My brother can now sleep at night. Wait. Until he realizes the water might have to be warmed up and does he have enough propane to last at least 3 months?

Friday, September 02, 2005

Ice Cream Wins Again...dangit

~sigh~ .......~sigh again~...........

so here's the story:

We got this little country store down the road from my house. It's been there as long as I've been breathing ....only been through like 3 owners the whole time. It's a store that if you're not from the probably wouldn't stop at. It's just old and the gas pumps are long dried up. Old men sit out in front and watch the vehicles go by and spit tobacco. My grandaddy used to sit out there many hours. It was/is gossip central and you can hear the police/ems scanner going off everytime you walk in. Country living, folks. Everyone in the area loves this place and you can find just about anything you need there...for a price, of course.

This place has hand dipped ice cream. For one dollar...that's $ can get a styrofoam cup (bigger than a kiddie cup...a tad smaller than a "to go" cup from your favorite place to eat) full to the brim of your choice of what's in the cooler. And we all know my weakness for ice cream. ~sigh again~ The other day when I went, I picked up a cup for me and one a piece for the girls. I think I picked peaches and cream that day. You never know the selection because it varies everytime. It's like a Christmas just never know what's inside. That day there was bubblegum. Yo. That should work perfect for Makenna. Bubblegum=kids. Right? Wrong. She was so upset because that is just disgusting (tasted pretty good to me later when I ate it for her). She wanted any flavor but that one. I promised to get her one next time I went. Mostly to shut her up at that moment.

So here I go yesterday in that Country Store. I asked the lady in charge if she had grape in stock? I knew for a fact that Mu loves the grape flavor. Next thing I know that woman is listing all the flavors available and I felt blood rushing to my head. Did she just say BANANA PUDDING????? I had to stop her. She DID say that. Oh sweet mercy. I knew I didn't need that ice cream. But I wanted that ice cream. Bad. (sounds like a crack addict again). As she's walking back to get Mu's, she asks if I want one? Crap. "Yeah," I holler back, "gimme one of that pudding...I'm having a hard time believin' that one." I get the cups in a sack and slunk back out to my van. I come straight home and put it in the freezer. I will resist. I will resist. I will resist.

Can I help it if Rock Star INXS was THAT good? I find my self walking in a trance to that freezer. Getting a spoon out of the drawer. Sitting back down. I am on the phone with Fred at this time and I don't let him know I am eating this ice cream. Why? I don't know...I just didn't! Ok? It would have been rude since he didn't have any. Sweet Mother. It's not bad. Then I bite into something. I am lost. IT HAD FREAKING VANILLA WAFERS IN IT, PEOPLE. Ohhhhh, the shock! Ohhhhh, the goodness and mercy. I cannot believe God gave such a marvelous talent to someone as to come up with that ice cream. I really can't. I think it rates right up there with being a heart surgeon.

So the ice cream won again. ~snort~ Like I really put up a fight.