Monday, April 03, 2006

To My Son

Two years ago yesterday you came into my life. I couldn't believe that you were exactly what I ordered. A dark HUGE brown eyes...and a head full of dark brown hair. My heart swelled to bursting when your daddy held you and just looked at you with awe in his eyes. I wanted to bawl like a baby (durn hormones!) when your sisters sat on the foot of the bed and held you with the biggest grins because all they wanted was a baby brother. They proudly wore their shirts that said "MuMu- Vitt's big sister" and "Sissy- Vitt's big sister".

You grew too fast for me. You walked at 8 months 3 weeks and you haven't stopped since. Your determination and pure bull head attitude make me think you will make it far in life or be really tough in prison one day. I just can't understand how one little boy can get into so much trouble and still smile such a sweet angelic smile that melts even the coldest of hearts. The way you furrow your eyebrows in concentration or frustration makes me believe you will need botox before I do. Probably before kindergarten, I'm afraid.

I miss your daddy and it breaks my heart that he is missing out on so much of your early years. There are times when you do small things and I file it away to tell Daddy when we talk. There's no way he can fully comprehend what I'm telling him, but it helps him to understand and even share in your life just a little more. When I miss your daddy the most, I can look at you and while you watch your Wiggles with the fullest concentration... I can see from your profile you have his beautiful lips. Your bottom lip jutts out just a tiny bit like his and it makes me smile. Because as long as I can look at you, Daddy isn't far away.

You have brought a dimension to my life that I didn't even know existed. I appreciate "little boys are made from snips and snails and puppy dog tails" more and more. I know that as long as I draw breath, you will love me with a fierceness that defies logic. I know this by the way you throw your tiny arms around my neck and squeeze like you're a 300 lb. bouncer and then kiss my cheek. I expect you shall find a love one day that fulfills you...but just remember Mama keeps a LOT of band aids for boo boos and my kisses have magical healing power.

You are no longer a baby, but a strapping toddler/preschooler. Soon I'll have to let you venture out into the real world to fight your a few damsels...and change the world. I wonder if the world is prepared for that?

Just remember this. When you are grown and doing wonderful will forever be my baby.

So quit trying to potty train yourself already! I'm not ready for it.


Jacinda said...

Oh, Hope!!!!! *cry* Our little Vitt is growing up!

Crazy Me said...

Awwww ... I have always wondered if parents look at their kids and always see them as their little babies. It must be hard to watch them grow up so fast.