Friday, March 30, 2007

Spring Break 2007

We are in the midst of Spring Break 2007. And I'm not too happy about it. Let me tell you why.

Back home in good ol' South Carolina, this break usually takes place during Easter. Our former school gives everyone Good Friday off and that's mostly because prom takes place that evening and none of the girls getting ready would show up that day anyway. Everyone heads to the beach for the beginning of good times the next week. (ohhh..the memories.....)

What is this? Having the break now? No Good Friday off? No real recognition of Easter? Not liking it one bit.

We headed home for a visit last weekend. The girls had the shortest visitation on record with their dad. Almost 3 and a half hours. Paige was determined not to go and when I made her, girlfriend decided to show me. She showed her entire butt until her dad called me to say they were coming home. Makenna was sick and it was also my niece's birthday, so in the end it worked out.

Except for Paige. Because of her actions, she lost her IPOD and cell phone upon her sitting down in the van. I was embarrassed because we all know our children's actions are a reflection on ourselves. I know. I know. We can't really control them and my mother in law is totally thinking I've forgotten all her teachings when she reads this. But, there was no sense in it. All I could think was this was fuel for the stepmother's twisted fire. Paige was required to write a letter of apology. One to her father and one to her stepmother. Requirements were that she apologize for her behavior. After that, I took a page from the counselor's book and let her do an "I feel..." section. This was her chance to state her issues with what's going on with them. The letter was to be no less than 200 words. Her dad's was over 800 and the step-mom's over 400. My baby can so write when motivated.

Paige then proceeded to get sick. Allergies and maybe a touch of a virus just put her down for the count. She received her cell phone back upon the mailing of the letters, but the IPOD was gone until Wednesday. Oh, the horror! Fred decided she needed to ride four hours back home Tuesday without the comfort of the IPOD. I don't think we'll ever do that again.

Have you ever ridden with an almost 13 year old for four hours? Who is sick? Who sits in the back row? Who has almost lost her voice and can't fully participate in the conversation? Who constantly says for you to "turn up the radio!" and "turn it down, I can't hear what you're saying!" Almost gave me the shakes.

Makenna is finally better after getting on some Zyrtec (spelling? not so sure and am too lazy to get up and go look at bottle). But, if we miss one dose? She is miserable the next day. We are religious with this every night before bed.

And my baby boy. God Bless him. He has just about potty trained himself. We just provide the underwear and pit stops. Being home meant being back in the country. Sitting on my mother's front porch, I saw him heading across the yard and stop and grab his privates. I hollered..."Pull your shorts down! Pee pee on the tree right there!" Why did I ever do that? Now outdoors is fair game. We live in a neighborhood. I was sitting outside and happened to look over at the park yesterday. I saw the full moon shining. He was peeing on the fence. We get out of the van under the carport and he runs to the side, pulls down his shorts, and lets it go with a big "AHHHHHH". We are doomed. He will be potty trained and arrested constantly for public indecent exposure. Save your change, people. We'll need it for bail.

Three days left til they go back to school and break time is officially over. My, how time flies when people are bored and don't want to do their chores, but want to go and do and whatnot. And, yeah, that was sarcasm.

Friday, March 23, 2007

Careful Now

Fred and I were out and about yesterday. Yes! By ourselves! We had some errands to run and I had to go by the super of marts because I had a meeting* at 6 p.m. and volunteered to bring something sweet. After leaving the super of marts, we decided to swing by the Chick Fillet for supper. I needed to eat before the meeting and he was in charge of supper, so Chick it was!

We were leaving C.F. to head back to house. I was preparing my sandwich so I could taste its chicken goodness when he hit the brakes "firmly"** and did a little jerk thing with the steering wheel. I paused a second to say "Whoa, now. Need to quit that jerking stuff." Then what? He had to swerve a little as I went to take a bite. I stopped. Looked at him. And said.....

"I have powers. Don't make me use them."

I then proceeded to eat my meal in peace for he was so afraid. ~snort~ Yeah, right.

* A meeting! Me! I am doing some volunteer work so that my resume will have something recent for when I go back in the work force when Vitt is in 4k. Smart me! Well, my Mama told me it would be a good thing to do.

**This is another post for another time, but suffice to say my husband and brakes in any vehicle he drives? They are close intimate friends by the time he gets where he is going.

Tuesday, March 20, 2007

Times are Changing

Time changed early this year. And there was a lot of grumbling about it. We're all used to this happening in April and October. Society doesn't like change, therefore, there were many unhappy people expressing their dislike over the turn of events.

Not me. I thought I might grumble a tad bit my own self until Vitt slept later. It was heaven. I could get the rest dressed and gone for the day while he slept. I could then get my first cup of coffee and head to the computer to check email and maybe play a game or two. Heck, I could even watch grown-up television. See some Good Morning America like old times. He would sleep until around 8 a.m., which qualified as Christmas in my book.

Then he got adjusted. Dangit. He adjusted and he's potty training. We went through a phase last week where we thought we had a newborn again. He was getting up around 1-2 a.m. and just being pure ornery. Getting in bed with us, giving Fred ten kinds of grief for some reason. Fred had circles under his eyes because Vitt wouldn't let him sleep. For some reason, he left me alone, but a squirming toddler in your bed does not make for quality sleep, people.

I finally figured out that he was waking up because he was having to potty. So, Fred started taking him to potty before bed. And this was working. Fred still gets tickled talking about how he weaves back and forth on the potty because he's still asleep.

This morning he woke up at 5 a.m. Just before Dad has to. And that's okay because he had pee'd in his pull-up and it woke him up. I could have slept through it but when your son calls out, "DAD. I pee my pullup" in a clear concise voice, it wakes you up no matter how hard you sleep.

He's adjusted to the time change and he's potty training.

I'm looking forward to these kids of ours having their own kids one day. I really am.

Oh, one more thing. I fix Makenna's hair every morning. We cannot put the comb or hairspray up until you have combed and put a touch of spray on Vitt's hair. He's not going anywhere, but he likes to be prepared I suppose. Wears me out.

Monday, March 19, 2007

What not to do

I've been meaning to mention this and life being the way it is....things tend to slip past and keep right on going.

There are some things in life you should never do. As you get older, you understand the wisdom of such rules and regulations and tend not to question them.

I forgot one very important one.

When you're having a conversation and your child brings you a glass of liquid and tells you to taste it? Do. Not. Do. It.

Because said child saw the lemon juice in the fridge and decided to make her own glass of ice cold lemonade and guess what? She forgot the key ingredient to making this concoction work is........

Know what it is yet?



It took me a while to recover from that.

I'm just passing on some good sound advice to all of you out there in Internet Land.


Friday, March 16, 2007

You need to do this....

Iffen you have an extra moment, please click on Mr. Cookie's link to the right of the page. He's got some really good Saint Paddy jokes out today that literally made me laugh out loud.

Go and enjoy!

An apology

Dear Vitt,

Remember back around Valentine's Day? When Mama had to get a whole new set of keys because it was determined that you had lost mine?


Mama loves purses. Alot. She doesn't buy alot of them because she's very picky about them. But, when one strikes her fancy, she has no choice but to purchase it because it's the right thing to do. I hope you will understand this one day.

Well, when the keys were lost, both Dad and I searched that purse at least a dozen times. We honestly did.

Yesterday I noticed the checkbook was put in wrong and decided to straighten it out. You see, when Dad puts things back in my purse, he kind of just puts them there and leaves it to me to put it back to my personal specifications.

I...uh....went to straighten the checkbook and noticed something odd. First it was in a side pocket that I truly didn't know existed. And at first I thought the shiny things in the bottom of said pocket were quarters.

I know.

It was my set of lost keys.

Dude, I'm sorry I blamed you. Really I am. I know just because 90% of all missing things in our seem to be involved ....we shouldn't jump to blame you automatically.

It was an honest blame. Forgive us, please.

Mama and Dad

As it should be

Last night the hubby and I were watching t.v. As some of you know, it's time for that basketball thingy to happen. I tolerate some sports on the television because he doesn't ask for a whole lot and I actually understand basketball somewhat.

We've recently purchased a new area rug for the living room. It's shaggy and huge and very comfy to lay on. I find myself laying on it and reading my magazines or going through catalogs more and more. Last night Fred decided to join me on the floor as we watched the games. Of course, he knew that Grey's Anatomy is way more important than the basketball game and agreed to turn it there at 9 p.m. There would be alot of switching back to the game during commercial breaks and I had no problem with that.

Apparently my son has decided to put the lovely huge floor cushions in his room for whatever reason and Fred had already laid claim to the one that had found its way back to the living room.

And I said....."I would certainly love to have a floor cushion of my own. It's in Vitt's room if you are so inclined."

He just looked at me.

Then I said..."Look. I don't ask for much around here. But, I have given birth to your son...who, I might add inherited your big head and that big head of his messed my monkey up for a long time, so if I need a pillow, you should get it for me because I've already done my duty."...."I'm just saying..."

By then he was laughing at me because I am good and deserve one of those acting awards because I can say all of this with a straight serious face. Like I truly mean it.

And he got that pillow for me.

Me and my monkey appreciate it.

Monday, March 12, 2007

It Can Not Be Allowed

I have decided that my children can not play competitive sports. They just can't.

This past Saturday, Makenna had a competition with her AWANAS* group from church. Fred was going to go with her whilst I sat at home with The Boy. I came to the conclusion around Thursday that the whole family needed to go and support not only Makenna, but the church, too. We had to wake up very early Saturday morning as the church holding the games was an hour and a half away. I simply was not thrilled about it. Plus, the fact that I am NOT a morning person had alot to do with it. Even the large coffee from Mickey D's didn't help a whole lot. Let's not even mention the drive there. The non-driving idiots who were in the caravan that got their license from the local dollar store. The whole way there I promised Fred I was going to get a hold of that chick in the boxcar scion thingy. He's a good man. He pretty much ignores me and Paige begs the whole way for me not to humiliate her and get us kicked out of the church.

I did refrain. Barely. But, I did.

It was bedlam there! So many children. Running. Screaming. ~shudder~

Paige was awesome because she took control of her brother and let him play on the playground while Fred and I watched the games. I owe her bigtime for that one. I might even break down and take her for a latte.

The games began. Fred and I had no idea what was going on, but it was easy to figure out after a couple of rounds. No wonder Mak comes home from church exhausted on Sunday nights. Whoever invented hat is off to you! They wear these kids out physically!! I don't know the names of the kids on Mak's team as we haven't been going to this church for long. You get so caught up in the excitement and find yourself screaming, "RUN BABIES RUN!!!!"

And run they did. Every game is played within/around this huge circle. Makenna participated in one game where you have to go all the way around the circle with a bean bag on your head. If it falls you must stop, put it back, and resume running. You are not allowed to hold it there. Teams of three lined up. One child took off around the circle. I saw Makenna waiting, jumping in place. When the kid got back around and gave it to Mak??? Oh, sweet Olympic medal. You should have seen our girl run. She put that beanbag on her head and she FLEW. Literally flew around that circle. Our people were on their feet urging her on. Me? "THAT'S MY BABY! THAT'S MY BABY!" When she got back around, her leader looked at me and was giving an enthusiastic thumbs up. I was amazed. Methinks the girl might have some athletic ability after watching her in the rest of the games. She definitely gets that from Fred.

I was so worn out after the games were done, I made the decree that the children simply could not do sports. I would end up a basket case for sure. Fred laughs, pats me on the shoulder and dreams of coaching winning teams. ~sigh~ And I thought ballet recitals were hard.

Oh, and their team GOT FIRST PLACE. Mak is hooked now. Nothing like a victory or a lucky hole in one to get you hooked on the game.

Lord, help me.


*AWANAS- how it was explained to me was this is like a Christian version of Boy/Girl Scouts. It's really a good deal and Mak is obsessed with it! The lesson parts and the games.

Wednesday, March 07, 2007

As If

The Man and I were watching t.v. the other day when a commercial came on advertising a huge golf tournament coming in May. All the big names will be there. I asked the hubby if this was the tournament down in Ponte Vedra. He said he wasn't sure, but it could be and did I want to go?

I was laying on the floor and I turned to look at him sitting in the recliner.

The tournament takes place the weekend of May 13. May 13 is Mother's Day AND my birthday this year.

I simply said....."I don't hardly think so. That's the royal weekend in case you've forgotten."


Men are funny creatures. They can't help it, though. DNA and testosterone just make them that way. A while back on a talk show, I heard a speaker say that men are problem solvers. Women like to talk things out, but men kick into problem solving mode automatically. I believe this to be true. The men in my life are problem solvers of huge proportions. My dad, brother, and especially my husband.

Now my husband is a manly man. There is nothing about him to suggest otherwise. When we were dating, he picked up a strange hobby. He started cross stitching. I kid you not. When I asked him about it, this is what I was told.

Alot of NFL teams make their players take ballet. Ballet helps with coordination and balance. It's not a widely advertised thing because it would be considered...ah....sissy? There are things "real" players have to do to stay on top of their game. So, he cross stitches. He is a nuclear electrician. He deals with motors and such....with lots and lots of tiny wires. When he was teaching power school, he wasn't dealing with motors on a regular basis, therefore he took up cross stitching to keep his dexterity and ability to focus in a very small area. I see his point and have a few nice pieces he's done in the past few years. ~shrugs~ When he's not on a boat, he occasionally works on something to keep the skills sharp.

He's not on a boat at this moment. He's working on some needlepoint/cross stitching with pillow cases for me. I personally don't have the patience to sit and do this, plus my eyes are going bad. It might take him a year or two to get it done.

Last night I came around the corner to see he had broken out a pillow case and was working on it. That was cool. Then I came farther in the room and guess what I saw?

Due to my newly re-arranged living room, the light isn't so good near his chair. And being the problem solver he is? He went and got his head band with the attached flash light on it and was wearing it to work. I just stopped and looked at him. And I said....

"Dude. You know what this means, right?"

"Yep. And I don't care. I need to be able to see."

"Oooookay, then. I just wanted to make sure you knew you opened yourself up to be blogged about."

I gotta admit. It was sort of manly looking, you know, the way he was doing it. He works on the boat with that head band thingy on, so he's really keeping his skills sharp.

Just wish I had the camera handy.

Sunday, March 04, 2007

An Edgy Weekend

We had decent sized weekend here. Lu and the girls got here Friday evening a little later than we expected, but it was all good. Paige skipped out on us and went to a friend's house Friday night. I was leery of letting her go. It's hard moving to a new place and not knowing everyone. And Fred and I are probably over a degree that borders on illegal in some countries. The girl she was staying with? Her mom and dad are divorced, but Dad lives next door. Mom works til midnight, but dad was there to supervise. We informed Paige she was to call every two hours and check in until the mom got home.....and no going out after dark. That part wasn't hard since the friend lives next door to a very old graveyard and Paige ain't about partying with the dead. Fred fell asleep in the recliner with both cell phone and house phone on his chest, waiting for her calls. That's where he slept all night long as I couldn't wake him up to go to bed. Truly. I tried to wake him up, but couldn't get louder than the snoring, but had the phone rang? He would have been wide awake. I probably could have said something like....."Chief! The boat is leaking!!!" and he would have been on his feet immediately, but why be cruel?

We got some good retail therapy in Saturday. I introduced my friend to the joys of shopping at Michael's....a store full of crafts and other fun things. We were in the one dollar bin going through spools of ribbon. This is my obsession because I was tired of buying expensive bows for Makenna's hair. She declared this year she was too old for bows, but would allow a pretty ribbon in her ponytail. It is now my life's mission to have ribbon for anything she and Paige might wear. Paige is into "polka spots" and the bin was full of different colored polka spotted ribbon. As we were looking, Fred had Vitt on his shoulders and they were about 10 feet away looking at something. This is how we harness Vitt when he won't ride on the buggy. He gets the shoulder trip from Dad.

Apparently, Vitt decided to lean back. Fred was unprepared. I heard Fred holler and looked up in time to see my son hit the floor. On his head. The good part? He fell somewhat into a silk flower display and that might have cushioned his fall a little bit. I literally felt my heart skip a beat...then stop...then stutter back into motion. It was one of those slow motion moments where you see it happening but can't seem to move. I could see Fred trying to catch him by the foot and his foot slipping out of his hand. Within seconds I had that baby in my arms feeling his head, neck, shoulders. I could hear in my head...don't move someone who has fallen like this! Keep them immobilized! Call 911 !! Uh, okay. Lu has worked in a doctor's office and has had alot of medical dealings. I was one inch from crying but knew I had to soothe Vitt and Fred was feeling ten kinds of bad and I was on the wrong side of being pissed at him for DROPPING MY CHILD!

Lu kept telling me to chill out. It was an accident. My rational mind was working, but not as loudly and sanely as my irrational for a little while. I finally gave Vitt over to Fred to take outside to the van so Dad could have some time to check him out. I worried the rest of the evening that he might have a concussion even though he was none the worse for wear as time passed. I thought for a minute his speech was slurred...but jeez, half the time we can't understand him. He's just learning to talk well!! Thank you, Lu, for telling me to just STOP. IT. NOW. Concussions are accompanied with crying, throwing up, messed up pupils. Okay. So how can you check pupils when the kid's eyes are such a dark brown, they're almost black???

We moved on past it. And it was hard not to put that kid in the bed with us....just to keep an eye on him.

Other than this piece of excitement, the weekend was wonderful. The weather was great, the food we sought out and found awesome, the shopping deals unbeatable.

My grammar and punctuation during this post? Not so good. Give me a break....I'm still traumatized.

Friday, March 02, 2007

Happenings around the Edge

Last night promised to be eventful. We were under tornado watches until 2 a.m. Fred made the girls sleep on our side just in case things got hairy. He's a good daddy. Paige might not believe it, but that man loves her like she's his own. Hopefully, one day.......

Makenna, on the other hand, is confident of his love. Heck, she's just plain confident. She informed Fred yesterday he was lucky to have her as a daughter. Something about having looks, brains, etc etc. I informed him it was time to start his own blog and share with the world.

Lu is coming to see me!!! I'm so excited. She and the twins are coming for the weekend and I can't wait for her to get here. She's about the only one who will make the drive down here to visit. Everyone else? Expects us to drive back to South Carolina all the time. ~sigh~ I finally have a large home and I live in a town with good stuff to see and do...with a HUGE city right down the interstate a short ways....and no one wants to sacrifice drive time to come see us. Lucky me. I just happen to have a father and brother who are home bodies. Those two hate to disrupt their routines with a passion! My Mom and Sis-in-Law? They'd come in a heartbeat, but hate to leave those men behind. Bro? I'm so shooting you the bird right now!

My decorating instincts are kicking in, people. I'm so proud of some of the stuff I've done around the house lately. I'm becoming more and more like my mom every day. She can cook AND decorate. Think of the money she could make on the cooking channels AND decorating shows. Dang.

Oh. Vitt is probably going to be moving to live with his Poppies. Fred's dad is a morning person. Vitt skips naps and goes to bed at 6:30 ...only to wake up around 4:30 a.m. informing his Dad he needs milk. It's killing us. Fred's dad is up for no good reason around 5 a.m. and goes to bed early. I think he and Vitt will get along just fine.

Hope all of you have a good weekend out in Internet Land.

Edited to Add:
I got my hair done. Yes! I am where I'm supposed to be now. I lovingly called my hair-do (that the cute little stylist who is 23 and smaller than my thumb did) ROCKSTAR HAIR. Paige liked it if that's any indication. I don't hardly care how she fixed it (because I would never be able to copy it on my own), I just feel blonde again. Thank you, Lord, for hair color. I'm scared to wash it, though, in case this hard water decides to make it some funky color that will scare small children and make dogs run away in fear.