Friday, October 26, 2007

Notes to Self

Dear Self,

- Do NOT go to any more function thingys on base anymore. Because if you do? You'll get roped in to volunteering for something else. You are working with three different things now. That's enough. No more.

- Stop arguing with the thirteen year old about eyeliner. She's only practising to be a lawyer and your final word IS law. She'll realize it sooner or later. You really don't care if she thinks it's fair or not. She's not wearing it now and a thousand buckets of tears is not going to change that.

- Please don't make faces when the eight year old proclaims that she is almost a woman because she is wearing deodorant. And please refrain from passing out when she announces she has "armpit hair". Yes, she believes that, but the rest of us know that after inspecting, she's feeling blind.

- Make sure, Self, that when you are PMS'ing, you get all the month's built up frustrations out in that one day. It seems the family is able to immune itself to one day's worth of lunatic rantings and ravings. Use it to your advantage.

- Don't put off blogging all the cute or funny things being said around the Edge. You are old now and can not rely on the memory to be as sharp as it once was.

- Also remember to make the computer "broken" when oldest has weird symptoms. You will find your go*gle search history will be filled with many symptoms that will make you want to rush her to the E.R. straight into emergency surgery. Hope and pray that she will use her go*gle knowledge to become a doctor and make loads of money so that she can take care of her Mama in her old age.

-Tolerate the World Series with a smile. It is only once a year and the man DOES let you enjoy your most important shows before turning it there to settle in and watch. (I bout crapped when I saw that man using the chain saw on his foot on Grey's last night. I literally covered my eyes!)

- Listen to the man throw out stats on teams like an encyclopedia. It gives him pleasure. He knows deep down you don't give a flip. But, he likes reciting them. Let him, it won't hurt you.

- Admit to the Internets that when you went to the craft thingy yesterday on base, you carved your very first pumpkin. And did a right nice job of it. Don't admit to the Internets that you upset a few new wives with the fact that leaving the pumpkin outdoors all carved up might not be a good idea as we live in the South and the overly warm weather will rot it within days. Let them live in a dream and have pumpkin mush on their front steps next weekend. Some don't believe it until they experience it anyways.

Now, Self, go drink a few more cups of coffee. You got a long day ahead of you. There's the Fall Festival at Mak's school tonight. You then get to rush home so you can rush on over to your meeting where there will be no hubbies, no kids, and lots of good foods. Now THAT's what I'm talking about.


Dani said...

:) - you make me smile Hope. I have to say though, there is nothing wrong with having pumpkins outside in the South ... as long as they ae not out there too long (we lived in FL and enjoyed carving our pumpkins, thank you very much ;)). Have fun at the fall festival and good luck with the ability to say no to some of the volunteer requests that come your way :)

Domestic Diva said...

Girl, you are just too busy for your own good. Calm it down a bit, will ya? ;)

See you soon!

OneHungMan said...

The joys of parenting and spousedom...

AndreaLeigh said...

I've never carved a pumpkin, either. Maybe it is time for me, too! Have fun at your meeting and enjoy your alone time.

Get Off My Lawn! said...

Put your pumpkin next to your snowman. That's what I do. It seems to last longer that way.

C said...

Go Sox! (Sorry, I know you're not into it.)

Okay, and I had the same reaction to th Grey's episode. Gah.

Yay for pumpkins!

Domestic Diva said...

Hey lawn...I about spit my coffee out reading your comment!!

Good thought, though. :)

Miss Hope said...

lHey Lawn? I'm sending Roscoe the Pumpkin to you via Speedy Delivery. I think giving you custody might be the only way he'll make it.