Sunday, April 20, 2008


There are times in a person's life when all color that makes things bright and beautiful are gone in an instant. One phone call, one knock on the door, one look, can be such a life altering have doubt that you can ever fully recover. Life as you know it is no more.

This past Friday evening, I received a phone call from back home in South Carolina.

It became one of those moments.

Our friends, Davie and Michelle (mentioned in previous posts), had a forever life changing altering moment. They were informed that their son, Spencer, had been in a car accident. Within an hour of the accident, I received the phone call from my Mama telling me to pray. Pray hard.

And pray I did. I prayed for mercy. I prayed for healing. I prayed for a miracle. I sent text messages to my friend to tell her that we knew and were praying. A simple "thanks...." was my reply. My own mother's heart was literally aching over what I imagined my friend to be going through. I had flashes of this beautiful impish toddler that had the whitest hair when he was The Boy's age. I flashed through all the years of seeing him grow up to the age of 16. Yes, Internets, 16. I remembered the last time I saw him on our visit home and how when I spoke to him the shock I felt when he responded in this gruff man sounding voice. How I grinned knowing the girls were crazy about that voice and that same impish smile he had as a toddler.

I called first thing Saturday morning to hear my Dad tell me it wasn't looking good. Fred and I immediately started praying. I was flat out begging by this point. I got everyone I knew of that believe in prayer busy for Spencer. My Dad called not long after to tell me he was gone. Just gone. At age 16. I'll be honest. I refused to believe it. Would not believe it.

Because to believe it would take such beautiful color out of this world. The color of Spencer. Each and every one of us come from God's palette and we have our very own unique color because He loves us just that much. The color of 16 is so bright and full of promise. It's multi-layered and complex, but simple in belief and innocent of most of the ways of this sometimes cruel world. For color that rich and amazing to be taken away......I just feel it has a way of taking away something that is good in a person's life.

How is a parent supposed to handle such a loss? The reality of losing a child is powerful enough to steal the very breath from your lungs and leave you gasping for understanding. How is a sister supposed to function without her little brother being an integral part of her life? How are grandparents supposed to face the loss of one their precious grand children?

Through all this trauma, one shining light prevails. Spencer's parents are helping God shower blessings on other individuals in this world. They let him be an organ donor. My knees hit the floor in prayer again that God will use this very precious gift to bless others in this very special way. To me, it keeps the color alive to mix with another unique color that is a human being. How wonderful can that be, Internets?

We are unable to make the trip home to be with our friends. Our Family. This family is heartbroken, but know that no matter what.....there is no doubt that all who are there know where our hearts are right now. We are crying with them and praying for them. We, too, are trying to get past the disbelief and cling to the thought that God is in control.

Spencer, we shall miss you. You were a beautiful bright shining light in this world. May the legacy you've left behind in beautiful parts of you heal and help those who would be lost and hopeless without you. We look forward to seeing you again one day.

Spencer T. March 1, 1992-April 19, 2008


House of Hayes said...

I am at a loss of words.I didn't know Spencer but feel I do now through your kind words about him.
I am continuing to pray for peace for his family and yours.
Big hugs are being sent to everyone.

Pikes Pickles said...

Your kind thoughtful words I am sure will bring a little ray of sunshine to this sweet families time of need.

C said...

Prayers to Spencer's family. What a beautiful post, Hope.

Mrs. Em said...

Truly beautiful, Hope.

For your family and Spencer's - May you cling to fact that God is with you every step of this journey that you will make.

My thoughts and prayers are with you.

Anonymous said...

Hope, my heart is so saddened for the whole Tanner family. I'm very thankful that they all love the Lord as much as they do. I continue to pray for comfort and peace for them. I'm very sorry for your loss also. I know how much you love that family. The words that you wrote were beautiful. Love you girl!

The Man on the Edge said...

Davie, Michelle and Stacey, My heart goes out to all of you. It breaks just knowing that we can't make it up there. I weep every time I think of Spencer and what you all must be going through. A part of my family is missing. Hope has put into words what we all are feeling. She is better at that than I am. My love and prayers are with you always. I love you and kow that we will all see Spencer again.

AndreaLeigh said...

This is heartbreaking. My prayers go out to this family, and to yours, Hope.

chelle's winks said...

Those are beautiful words you have said about Spencer. I don't really know what to say here except my prayers are with this family at this time.

Michelle Tanner said...

Hope, thank you so much for those words, my heart is so broken and tears are falling for my precious baby boy, he was so beautiful and loving, I don't know how to go on without him, but I do know that with God's help we will. Please continue to pray for David, Stacey, Jay and me as we try to go on without him. We do know that he is in a much better place and that is the most comforting thing to know. We understand and know that you would be here if possible and we know that you loved him too, he thought alot of Paige and I thank her for being Spencer's friend. I just ask that all of you keep him alive in your hearts and to never forget him. we love you, Michelle

andria said...

I do not know that boy, but I have cried for him this morning, for his family, and for you.

My cousin's daughter died at 16 on Jacob's birthday just a few weeks ago the same way. I still cannot believe it. It just seems so wrong for someone so young to just be gone.

Your words were beautiful.

OneHungMan said...

Can't express the level of "sucks" your story reached.

Sugar said...

Miss Hope, words don't do justice for how sorry I am for your loss. God bless.

Get Off My Lawn! said...

I share the inability to grasp what this must do to a parent. Thoughts are with you and the family in question. I always think "what a waste" when I think of all someone could do in a lifetime.

Miss Hope said...

To all who have left comments and those who have come by to visit.....we all thank you.

The funeral service honoring Spencer's life will be Tuesday afternoon at 4 p.m. East Coast time. Please keep the family close in your thoughts and prayers, especially during this time.

What is going on now is what I call "constant grief in motion".

Sam, Missy and Alex said...

God be with you all and those in your circle, may He be your comfort and strength!

Much love and peace to you all!
The Pikes

Krys72599 said...

To the Tanners:
Know that your friends and family, and the strangers who read Miss Hope's blog, are praying for you and with you and will always have a piece of Spencer to remember.
I'm so very sorry for your loss.
I will take a moment this afternoon to make a special prayer for your son and brother.