Tuesday, October 21, 2008

A Watchful Eye

The Appointment.

It went really well. I have to admit I was leery of meeting this new doctor. I heard from Rose (The Boy's psychologist) that although she really liked working with him, he was on the abrasive side. She kept assuring me that if I didn't like him, we could find another psychiatrist. Another friend or two mentioned he was abrasive so don't get upset over it. I won't lie, I was expecting this grumpy old man who deep down hated kids to greet us.

By golly, I liked him. Does that mean I'm abrasive, too? I'm thinking I can be at times. What did I like? His blunt this-is-how-it-is-and-I'm-not-gonna-B.S.-you attitude. He was approachable and asked many questions. As we talked to him, we were constantly trying to get The Boy to sit down and behave. Dr. M. never said a word about it until he looked at us and asked what we thought about medication. I kid you not, Internets. I started running off at the mouth like I had no sense. I can't even begin to tell you what I was talking about. Finally, I stopped, looked at him, and said, "What do YOU think about medication?" He smiled and said, "I think we might need to try something." He pointed out that we had tried to redirect The Boy at least a dozen times since we got in his office. I hadn't realized it, I was just doing what was normal to us.

The Man was able to express his views on medication and how he wasn't too thrilled about it. The doctor respected his thoughts but was able to counteract a few of them with experience and data. The Man is all about some data.

It is not common for children under age 6 to have to take medication. Some times it has to be done.

The Boy has been given focalin xr to try. Dr. M. says he wants to try this one because it lasts 6-8 hours...long enough for a school day. Then I went there. I said...uh, I'm all for a 10-12 hour type of pill myself. You don't know how hard it is in the afternoon and evenings! We are all worn clean out by the time bedtime comes. It's like we all sit down with a collective SIGH when we get The Boy in bed at night. It's some tough living at times.

This isn't something we want to do. I don't want to medicate my four year old child. But, I can tell you this. If he had asthma? I'd make sure he had medication. If he had diabetes? I'd make sure he had medication. Whatever it took....I'd make sure he has it. What's going on now? It's not asthma or diabetes, but there's something going on that has to be addressed.

My friend Jill said his issue has a name now. That gives us ammunition we didn't have before and we are now given power to find a solution that works best for him.

We're doing the best we can, Internets.

I have my baby home with me today. I want to be the one to see how he reacts the first day he takes this pill. I want to be the one who can tell the doctor how it worked the first time. He has a wonderful teacher that we adore, but this falls under MY jurisdiction. That's how I roll.

Another plus to this certain pill? If he can't swallow it, I can open it and sprinkle it on some pudding or applesauce. Yeah, we had to do that. Bless his heart, he sure tried to take it like a big boy, but just couldn't swallow it. I broke out the pudding and sat down with him and explained the deal. I don't ever force my kids to do something without explaining the deal. There have been times I've had to make them, but usually if I stay calm and tell it how it is? They cooperate. And he did beautifully. Hey, he scored some pudding first thing. That's huge in his world.

Now, we wait and see. I'm typing to you and I have an eye on him. I don't know what I'm expecting. I think, in my inexperienced way, I'm anticipating this "light switch" moment. Where he goes from jumping from one piece of furniture to another, to sitting down and being perfectly still. Seriously? I'd settle for something in the middle of that. It hasn't been an hour yet since he took it. This is killing my nerves!

Twenty years from now, this kid better look back on my blogging days and realize just how much his Mama loves him. If he doesn't? I'm going to smack him up side the back of his head. Mark my words. I'll do it. He might be a strapping 24 year old by then, but smack him I will.

One more thing to share with you. Yesterday was The Boy and Makenna's six month check up at the dentist. Now, he did wonderful last time, but that's not always a guarantee. The Man went with us because I felt having back-up was a good thing and it's easier to double-team when both parents are there. When they were both called back, The Boy started heading that way. I asked him if he wanted me to go with him. He replied, "No, Ma'am". Oh really? I smugly sat there and waited for them to come get me because there was no way he was going to go through the entire process without my presence there. After a while, no one came to get us. I just assumed they hadn't gotten to him yet and he was destroying the entire back of the office and they were just too proud to come get me. Smugness is not attractive, Internets. Next thing we know? He's coming out with his goody bag and two stickers. What??? We were informed that he was perfect. What????? He even let them take some x-rays. What????????? They were talking about MY kid!! I was so proud of him, I could have burst. We jumped right on the praise train and had him ten feet tall before we got home. That is such a HUGE accomplishment for any child. No cavities for either child. Ice cream was the reward.

Now, I get to go and watch my child with a Mama's Eagle Eye while I prepare for this week's Crafts & Conversations at the base Chapel and get my stuff straight for Compass class next week.

A text from Chelle yesterday said something to the effect of: "You can't have just one thing going on, can you?"


OneHungMan said...

OneHung rolls like you do. He's all in favor of a 12-hour pill. The Hungs hate to drug their boy, but sometimes they need a night of sleep too.

Krys72599 said...

I'm not educated in the whys and wherefores of ADHD and medicating as an option, but you sure sound sane and logical about it. My gut would be to not use medication, but then you went and used the asthma/diabetes argument -- and you're 150% right! And I have indeed heard of kids who started off on meds and were able to learn enough on the behavioral side of things to wean themselves off it after a time... Use what you need for your boy, be it medicine, behavior modification, diet, etc.
Based on his OUTSTANDING dentist visit, he can do this!!!
We're proud of him, too, and proud of you and his dad, as well!!!

Sam, Missy and Alex said...

I hope all turns out well!
I love wrapping in puddin' for a quick dose!
I am glad you have docs that are making sense on this all!! What a blessing!

Monogram Queen said...

I am very glad you liked the doctor and I hope the meds work well and maybe eventually he won't have to take them anymore.
I really admire you for wanting to watch the effects the first day. Not all parents care that much, sad to say. Let us know how he does. Fingers crossed!

Melinda said...

That pill is what Remy has been using for the past 6 or so months. I got to say, it's been a huge life saver for him. We've had our ups and downs with meds over the years. I didn't want my child to need to take it. Bless my MIL because she said the same thing you said in your blog - if he had asthma, if he had diabetes, etc he would have a need for meds. Sometimes, for some kids it is just as simple as that. It doesn't make you a bad parent, it doesn't make your child bad - it just means that God has something planned for you guys that you can't see right now.

Denise said...

That sounds like a doctor I would like. Not abrasive, but straight-forward and helpful. I hope this med works out for you. Being a parent is hard, man! But so is being a kid, so if he needs some help, then I'm glad he's getting it!

AndreaLeigh said...

I'm so glad you got some answers. Remember if this isn't the perfect fit, there may be something else or some combination of things that are. This is a journey, and you will reach the other side!

Williams Family said...

I am glad there is a light at the end of the tunnel now for a solution!!! I am sensing alot of relief and alot less nervousness about the boys future! He is going to do wonderful!!
Cami was diagnosed with really bad Allergies while we were in VA and try as I might i couldn't bare to have my baby girl going through life with a constantly snot nose and puffy eyes looking like someone beat her up!!! It took a combination of 3meds in the end to get them under control!! It sucked and I hated medicating her but it was what was best at the time! Now that we are back in HI she isn't on any meds (well except vitamins on occasion but those aren't even a daily thing just when she decides she isn't going to eat a balanced diet!!)Well good luck and keep us posted on how he is doing and how the med work for him!!!

Pikes Pickles said...

Ahhh Hope answers. Or at least something that you can specifically google. Isn't that what it really about? You and your wonderful family can totally do this. I know the little guy will turn out just fine. He will be the mover and shaker of tomorrows boardroom or wardroom ...lol.

Keep up the fight. Funny how we moms will climb mountains and swim oceans for our babies?

Michelle said...

Glad you liked the doctor...hope this will be the perfect fix and the answer to everything for you and the boy.

You are doing a great job and I think the right thing...

Call if ya need me...