New All Around

Hi there! Can you believe we're already starting the second full week in January? I personally feel like it was just Thanksgiving last week!

The Edge has now officially relocated to a new place! The time period between Thanksgiving and New Year's was like a hurricane, tornado, and tidal wave all rolled into one. Once we got the new house deal rolling, life took on a new gear that I didn't even know existed!

I'm going to stop a second now to ask you out there in Internet Land: Do you ever just wish that real life would stop so you can catch your breath and take care of a few things?

That's where I was and where I am today. Christmas was still going to happen no matter what was going on in my life at the moment. The Man closed on the new Edge on the 21st of December. I packed the kids up and all our Christmas goodness and headed here to spend a night before heading to South Carolina for the holiday. We had a short short stay there before heading back to "old" Edge to pack it all up.

The 28th found us greeting packers into our home to start wrapping it all up. I was so grateful The Man had the time off to be there to help out. Apparently, all the running and going tried to catch up with me and I honestly thought I was fighting the flu. Neighbor Debbie (God Bless her!!) came out to keep us company whilst the packers packed it all up. She is a veteran mover in the military world and I trusted that she would keep a sharp eye on things and help a sister out if it didn't look right. Tuesday was a hard day. I was literally in a stupor I was so sick. I got to the point that they packed up my bedroom (left the bed). I found my way between boxes to that glorious bed where I passed clean out until the next morning.

Wednesday, the movers showed up to load us up and carry us away. Whew. They worked like dogs to get that truck loaded with our worldly possessions and we were right behind them cleaning since we wanted to check out of base housing that day. Neighbor Debbie is a beast at working and I tried like heck to keep up with her but I just didn't have it in me. I was fighting like crazy just to keep upright and focused. USS Retired and her family stopped by on their way to an afternoon movie and we were just all teary and junk because dangit, leaving friends just isn't right.

Neighbor Debbie kept swearing up and down we weren't going to be able to check out that day. I just shrugged and said it was worth a shot. She finally had to get home to her family but we were kind of almost but not sure we might would make it with checking out. The movers kicked it into 6th gear and so did we. It was a race against the clock.

USS Retired and family showed back up to pick up where Neighbor Debbie left off. There was mopping going on, hauling stuff to vehicles, and lots of kid's giggles going around. The movers had packed my cooler on the truck and were gone by this time. Uh oh. That meant Mizz Retired got to take alot of food home with her!

We scored. Check out happened without incident and we were cleared from living there ever again. I walked through each room one more time and just thanked the Lord for providing us with a happy home in that place...if only for a short time.

I have to pause a second here to make sure you all understand how much I appreciate what Neighbor Debbie and Mizz Retired did for me and my family. There is no way we would have been able to do what we did without their help. They brush me off when I keep thanking them but I just love those gals and am so very proud to call them my friends!

It was decided that we would eat a hot meal at the Barrel of Crackers before hitting the road for a 4-5 hour drive to our new home. We all just needed to sit down a minute and catch our breath. Miss Retired and her family joined us and it was a festive laughing occasion. We had to regret one more time that we didn't find each other sooner.

That drive took every bit I had left in me, Internets. Paige tried her best to keep me company but had to doze off now and again. Makenna was riding shotgun with The Man and the poor thing had worked harder that day than in her whole entire life so she was out like a light. My husband and I kept calling each other to check in and make sure the other was functioning. The Boy was watching a favorite movie when he finally gave in and fell asleep.

We arrived at our new home at 2 a.m. I don't hardly remember coming in and falling into a deep sleep on the aerobed we had left here. It wasn't a long sleep as the movers were showing up at 7 a.m. They wanted to unload so they could be with family as it was New Year's Eve.

Tired of reading yet? I lived this and I'm tired of reading it all!!

Suffice it to say that our New Year's Eve was spent in our new home surrounded by mountains of boxes. We slept in our own beds that night and decided to just take the next day off and try to recover.

I am sick of boxes. I feel like I unpack at least ten a day and there's no end in sight! The kitchen is the heart of the home to me and I feel like it is mostly done. I don't feel like this is home because there are none of my pictures on the walls as of yet. I need to get a feel for things first. I don't want to go putting holes in a wall and the next day change my mind and move whatever is hanging there. The wall colors are a neutral selling color and I really really want to paint and make this place my own. I have been scouring sites for ideas for paint and decorating . If you were to call and ask me what I think of a decorating/paint idea? I can picture it and tell you what I think. But, for my house? Eh, not so much. Crazy, I know.

About this place where we live. It. Is. Cold. Dear Joseph and the baby lambs is it cold. I feel like I've moved to this whole new region of the country instead of higher up in the state of Georgia. I miss smelling the sea air and birds that hang out at the coast. I have never been this chilled in my entire life. Truly, I haven't. Some locals have informed me that this is NOT the normal temps for this area. I'm going to take their word for it and pray this is a fluke that happens every five years or so.

I got the kids registered in their new schools and started. The Boy is having some issues adjusting, but we anticipated that happening. He's riding the bus for the first time and is totally enjoying the freedom of no seat belt. Makenna is going along like she always does and enjoying her new busy schedule. She's had an issue with some little snotty girl making comments and Paige and I keep offering advice. Makes me want to go to the school and snatch this kid up and cut her butt. Paige is rolling right along in her new high school. She's got a vacation semester taking half credits. She may have to hit up summer school to get back on track with how their credit system works, but that's no biggie. She'll just end up with way more credits than needed when graduation time hits.

I am glad to say, though, that some things never change. The past week, I have cooked supper every night because we were just flat out tired of eating out. (Plus, that gets right pricey after a while!) Same table, new house, our usual Dinner Theater! By night two of our family supper, the kids were back in form and entertaining us. Paige discovered a plastic wine glass while unpacking and has taken to drinking "bubbly" Ginger Ale out of it with her meal. It makes her happy and fancy, so who am I to crush easy happiness?

We are adjusting to this new life. I shall be asking opinions and such in the upcoming weeks because I'm ready to put my stamp on this place and make it my own. Err...our own?

You all try to keep warm and know that no one will judge you if you have to wear socks to bed. I'm just saying.

Sit a Spell

Well, hey there! Come on in and sit a spell while I catch you up on what's been happening at The Edge. There's coffee in the pot, creamer in the fridge, and toaster strudels if you're hungry. Make yourself at home.

Where to start?

Oh, I know.

We got a house!!!

We got us a BIG house. That's not bragging, either. That's me sitting here with my eyes wide open wondering how in the heck I'm going to keep that bad boy clean. All I can say is God was all over this. Shoot, He's been all over the whole entire deal as far as I'm concerned.

The kids and I have been to the Augusta (Georgia) area a couple of times to house hunt with The Man. Now, one thing you need to understand about my husband. That man has been all over the blessed world and he just adapts to where ever he is. Nothing really fazes him and he goes with the flow. Paige was my co-pilot as we drove to meet him the first weekend. Did you know Augusta is a hilly place??? Lawd. I know there are those of you who live near or in the mountains and you're laughing and thinking, "Sister? You ain't SEEN a hill yet!" I've been to the mountains, thank you very much. You have to realize that this girl has lived near the East Coast all my entire life. What I personally didn't realize is this is apparently the Flat Lands..with lots of trees. Imagine my huffiness when we finally reached our destination and I confronted that husband of mine about why on earth didn't he tell me about the HILLS?!?! Yes, he had a confused look on his face and couldn't understand my angst.

Can I pause a minute to say, "Thank you, Lord, for a GPS navigation system." ? If I hadn't had that bad boy leading me.....my kids and I would be wandering back streets starving by now. The first time we arrived at night. Paige and I were thrilled and then a little scared. Of the hills, man. My learning driver gasped and fretted as we followed Mr. Tom's directions to our destination. She asked me in a panic, "How will I tell my friends how to get to our house? Go over six hills and take a left????" It was a new experience to be sure and it wasn't until the next week that I realized that HOLY SMOKES! I have to learn how to drive in that place and soon!

I have to admit that house hunting got old quick. You look at so many in such a short time and they all start running together. Curse you, HGTV, for making it look so simple and all 30 minutes long. We didn't find "The House" on my first trip and I was just disgusted. The Man persevered and kept looking after work until he found a few he liked. It was time to head that way again. We headed out the Sunday before Thanksgiving to spend a day or two with him before we all headed to SC for Thanksgiving (separate post with cute pictures on that subject). I thought I had found a house that I really really liked. To where I dramatically leaned against the stairs in true Scarlett fashion and declared, "I LOVE THIS HOUSE!"

Then we saw it. It was fabulous. It was in our price range. It was The House. I walked and looked and walked and looked. I just knew there was no way we could do this amazing house. (that was before money was discussed.) I kept looking at my husband and giving him the How-dare-you-show-me-this-when-I-know-we-can't-afford-it look. We played it cool since the broker was there. Our amazing realtor got the low-down for us as we waited outside and discussed what was sitting before us.

We headed back to the hotel to discuss this and just decided to put on some floaties and jump right in. Monday after work, we took the kids with us and went to talk business. The kids were beyond thrilled and after I gave the camera to The Boy and he learned how to video? We had no problems out of them.

Our offer was accepted and a bidding war with another family was avoided (whew!). We walked away anxious and excited and ready for the builder (this is new construction!) to accept the contract.

We haven't looked back.

We headed to South Carolina for Thanksgiving and that Wednesday we got word that the builder signed! What a moment.

Yesterday, we got word that all things financial are a go. The only thing we're waiting on now is the appraisal to go through. Closing is set for December 21st. DECEMBER 21ST, INTERNETS!

Hold on whilst I panic for a moment, please.

We are moving. Into a house. Before the end of the month. I am just giddy, scared, excited, and dreading the packing, unpacking part. At least the Navy will move us and I won't have to pack up on my own like I did before we moved down here.

Want to hear something funny? My husband has already called the power company about putting the power in our names on the 21st (the builder has it now). He intends to sign papers and sleep there that night because he got himself an aerobed on Black Friday. The Man is serious, Internets. I have asked this question to a few friends and they all got it right the first time. What else would a man take care of...that would have high priority?

Yep.

He's got the cable and internet lined up, too. I told Neighbor Debbie he'll have a bed, laptop, and a roll of toilet paper. We might not see him again!

I am busy here getting school stuff taken care of for the kids. The Boy has been to Dr. M a few extra times so we can get him as straight as we can before leaving. I'm going to miss Dr. M. We have a good thing going concerning my son and I hope I can find someone in the new town that really works with me to insure the well being of The Boy.

I have moments where I am very overwhelmed with what has to be done and I'm not so sure I will be able to get it all taken care of on time. We all know I will...but I still worry and I don't care how big of a nerve pill you take, those things can only help so much.

I think one of the hardest things is not decorating for Christmas. Oh, how I love to decorate for Christmas. I have some fabulous decorations (because I am old and have had time to collect) that I always look forward to putting up. We tried to explain to The Boy why we're not able to put a tree up, but I don't think he gets it. I'm an inch away from going to W-mart to get a small pre-lit tree and some balls to put up for him. Something that will only take a few minutes to take down.

My husband is just a wonderful man, Internets. I am a simple girl. Sure, I like nice things and I have a couple of nice things, but I truly am not a materialistic person. I made the comment a couple of times that I'm not sure I'm good enough to live in a house this nice. I'm not putting myself down, it's just that I've dreamed and figured that's all it would be...just nice dreams. My husband has worked his butt off for twenty years in service to this country and because he chose a good rate (or it chose him?), he's able to find a good job in this economy we got going on right now. I am blessed that he loves his family as much as he does and wants to provide for us the best he can. I can't wait to hang all his Navy stuff up on the walls so that others will know what he's done. I thank God for the mate He has provided for me every day.

Yes, I do have pictures, but I hope you'll be patient and let me put my stamp on this home before putting some up. I only took a few so I would have something to look at to remind me this is a dream that's becoming a reality (as long as the appraisal goes well!).

Don't forget you have to let me be sad that I'm leaving this wonderful place that has been our home for three and half years. I will miss it so much and the people that have become so special to me. One good thing about a military family, though. They'll go visit! I hope and pray they will come visit me so we can continue to share our lives.

Look for the Thanksgiving post. I got a few cute pictures I want to share with you and I know you'll like them, too. Now, I'm off to start my mountains of laundry and wait for my husband to get here for the weekend.

The Chief has Retired

This young man joined United States Navy 20 years ago. His grand idea was to serve one term or enlistment and get out and attend college. That was twenty years ago. His incredibly smart brain got him sucked in the nuclear power program and it just took off from there. What an adventure this sailor has had over the span of those twenty years. He got to see the world and prove all those cool commercials you see on television to be true. He started in 1989 weighing not much more than a buck fifty and a head full of dark hair. He has slowed down a little bit since then as the knees have taken a beating working on metal floors in submarines for so long.

I met this sailor in 2001. We were both in our 30's and had some baggage we were toting around with us. Yet, we got past that baggage to discover that we were meant to be together from that moment on. What an adventure I've had in the past eight years. When I met my husband, I was a small town girl content and satisfied to live in that small town forever and ever amen. He showed me our great country by introducing traveling to my life. With him, I flew in an airplane for the first time, went to visit the West, drove across TEXAS (everyone should have to do this at least one time in their lives), and so many other fun things I never even thought about.

Because of this man and his patience and love for life, I found a side of myself that I never knew existed. The side that would leave that small town to see what else was out there. I will never be able to thank him enough.

You and I will never know exactly what he has seen, experienced, and done. He alone will have those memories to visit when he's older and sitting at the end of the day looking over his life. I admit to being somewhat jealous of those memories because I do know they will be amazing.

I am so honored to be a part of this Chief's life. The future is unfolding in front of us and, even though I wasn't there the entire twenty years of his Naval adventure.....I'm right beside him for the next adventure happening now.

Thank you, Chief The Man. Thank you for serving our country for twenty years and for crying when you said good bye. You are the type of person we need defending our freedom for always.

I understand

Yes, I understand I am a bad blogger. I accept this and fully resolve to make it all better.

Soon.

You see, school started back but that didn't slow me down. Different types of appointments took the place of the summer appointments and running around took a whole new frantic meaning.

I've had thoughts I've wanted to share with you all. Ohhhhhhh, the thoughts I've had. So many that I'm afraid I may have lost some in the recesses of my brain and they'll never have a chance to be shared with you. Moving on now because that just makes me sad.

Tomorrow my Makenna has surgery on her sinuses. I have watched this sweet child of mine very closely the past month or so and I've noticed a few things. The bridge of her nose always looks bruised. She has dark circles under her eyes from waking up constantly to nose bleeds, therefore getting no real rest. She sleeps when she gets home from school and she has never been a child to do that...unless sick. Her skin is so very pale. Middle of winter pale. She doesn't look like she had an amazing summer full of fun and sun (she's felt too badly to go outside much). Her beautiful white blonde hair has lost it's luster. It has a dull blonde look to it now. I know part of it is from aging, puberty, and etc. Her sister went through this. It just doesn't look healthy. She doesn't look healthy. I've got to do what I can to get her well.

I have sweet pictures of my Boy's first day of school. He has such a love for Kindergarten. My focus has been fully on him for long. Now, he's doing great and thriving. I'm doing my best to step back and let him breathe, find his way in Big Boy School, and just be five. I am just in constant awe of this little guy who has just blossomed before our eyes. He has become a wonderful source of entertainment around our home.

That Miss Paige. Whew. Girlfriend had herself a hard summer but I think she's going to be okay. She started off her Sophomore (Sophomore? When did I get a kid that old??) on a strong foot with studying and being on top of her work. Because of some not so good summer decisions, her cell phone now no longer works between the hours of 10 p.m. and 6 a.m. Smartest thing we ever could have done. Being fifteen is hard. If you had it easy at fifteen? Then hush. You are rare and the rest of us don't want to have to beat you up over it. I love my Baby Girl and I know she's going to come out shining and better for having learned the hard way.

I know I have to do a Summer 2009 post. Finances didn't let us take a nice fancy vacation. I scrounged around and was able to find us a few fun things to do that didn't break the bank. We were together as a family and made some amazing memories. Yes, I have pictures and will share with you soon.

Have I mentioned my husband retires in a little less than a month? Have I mentioned that I have never been so stressed in my entire flippin' life? I have this sense of urgency overcoming me all the time. This is why Makenna is having surgery tomorrow. This HAS to be done before retirement. I want to get taken care of what I can before having to learn to deal with a whole new insurance. Dentist appointments have taken on a whole new meaning. It's just crazy, I tell you. We've had eyes checked and new glasses bought (yep, got a picture of those, too!).

I have become very dependant on my cell phone. I have alarms for any and all appointments. It goes off constantly, Internets. If I lose my phone? I am so up a creek without a paddle. What's even worse is that I make Paige and The Man put the alarms in their phones...just in case I lose mine. Oh, what have I become???

I have become "that weird woman". I called today to make a doctor's appointment for some time in the next week. When asked why I needed to see the doctor, I replied, "Because I'm crazy." Appointment Lady laughs and says she really doesn't want to put that down as the reason. She said..."What about a med check?" I said, "Oh yeah, that's perfect, because we're gonna be CHECKING some meds OUT!" Bless her, she was a good sport. I believe she knew I wasn't joking but was keeping it lite so I didn't flip out on the phone with her.

I also want to say I've done this post today because my very good friend Girlfriend Down the Street was fussing about my poor blogging skills. G.D.S. keeps me tickled on face*of*books all the time. She no longer lives close to me, but I'm keeping her close to my heart. We Southern Gals tend to do that, you know.

Tomorrow morning at 6:30 a.m., I'll be handing over my child in the care of strangers. I'll sit and worry until I touch her face again. I'll pray and text and probably snap at The Man because he's sitting there and he loves me enough to take it. If you are so inclined? Prayers that all goes well will be truly appreciated.

Next week should be my time to truly catch up. I will be here at The Edge keeping Makenna company as she recovers some. Not sure how many days she'll get off...it all depends on the surgery and how extensive it ends up being when he gets up in those sinuses of hers.

You all keep playing nice....I'll be back shortly!

Plain Confusing

I am full of confusion and because of that, I am causing mass confusion in my family.

For example, we really don't know where we're going to be in a few months. The Man has gotten a very sweet job offer here in the state of Georgia. It's not back in South Carolina where my heart wants to be. I am having such a hard time with that. I told God what I wanted. Isn't that how it works?

Humble has become my middle name.

What I want may not be what He has planned. It's very hard for me to accept that. What's wrong with wanting to go home? I want to be near family and friends. I want to go visit them when I feel like it. I want to live close enough that they might even come see me! This is has just about broken my heart.

There's nothing wrong with where the job offer is. It's 100 miles closer to my family than where I am now. That'll make it easier on us to go visit them. It's not close enough for them to come visit us, but I guess I can deal with that or keep getting my feelings hurt over it. I'll let you know when I'm done being hurt....right now, I'm just not there.

Carla-Girl and her family are supposed to be heading to the same area as her husband got a job offer at this place first. I have surely neglected mentioning her lately. They, too, are heading into retirement and dealing with most of the same issues we are. There's a slight difference, though. That woman is amazing. She is a planner, researcher, decorator....just all around good at this stuff. She is the daughter of a retired Marine, so she knows how to move on to the next area. I am in constant awe of her abilities (and right jealous, too!) to make situations work and she's looking out for me, too. I am so blessed to have her guiding me with things like house hunting, Realtors, schools, and etc. I would honestly be lost without her help and patience.

I can't tell you how many hours we've sat on the computers looking at houses online. I've never bought a house before, so this is exciting and thrilling to this ol' girl. Lists are being made of the "must haves", the "no ways", the "wish it had this", and the "pinch me I'm dreaming if I get this" items. I am discovering what's the harm in dreaming if you can keep it realistic in the end?

I'm causing confusion with my family members here because one minute? I'm declaring we're moving in September. The next minute? The kids and I are staying here until end of November. I am so passionate and firmly believe whatever I'm talking about at that moment. It's wearing us all out.

In my Perfect World, everything will fall into place and I'll have perfect hair and eyebrows when it happens. Realistically? We'll be flying by the seat of our pants and I'll have a first aid kit clutched in my hands full of bandages and antibiotic ointment for the bumps and bruises we're bound to get during the ride.

Did I mention my husband accepted that job offer? Yeah, he did. I just can't breathe good until I know he's signed, sealed, and delivered. When he goes to that first day on the new job, I'll be able to shake off a bunch of stress.....I think.

Just promise me I'll have a place to put my gorgeous Christmas tree this December and I'll probably make it.

Yeah, I'm wondering why I'm not on nerve medication, too.

Moving steady forward

First off, as of yesterday (June 21st), I have been smoke free for one solid month. A whole month without a cigarette. When I decided to quit, I honestly didn't know if I'd make it one day, much less a month. Is it getting easier? Sure. The habit is getting broken hour by hour as I find other things to fill my time. I'm not craving the nicotine per se, although I have the occasional day dream of the drug hitting my brain and the soothing goodness that comes from it. I don't ever want to pick up the habit again. It costs too much financially and health-wise. I miss it, God KNOWS I miss it. I still have to make the decision NOT to smoke every single day, some times every single hour. Maybe I always will.

On to current thoughts and such, my will power was surely tested this weekend. Since The Man and I decided that he should retire this upcoming November, we've been put on a roller coaster ride of MASSIVE proportions. I love a good roller coaster, mind you, but it's been a while since I've ridden one. I've gone along with the ride for the most part. I've planned the reception for his ceremony and got that taken care of. I'm not stressing a bit over that part.

This weekend, out of nowhere, I got hit with a sucker punch.

It hit me that I may have to uproot my family and take them to yet another new place to live. I don't want to do that. I'll be honest and up front with you.

I.Don't.Want.To.Do.That.

These are things I CAN do but DON'T want to do:

1. Find a decent school district and put my children in different schools where I know no person that works there.

2. Find new doctors(family doc, psychiatrist, psychologist) that will provide quality care for my family.

3. Find another OB/GYN for my personal needs.

4. Find a new dentist for all of us.

5. Find a new church that will fill my family's spiritual needs. (This should really be first.)

6. Find my way around a new town.

7. Map another route back to South Carolina to my parents house.

8. Realize that if I am over 35 miles away from my family, they won't come visit. Ever.

I just about melted on the floor. I got so angry and mad about the whole entire deal. For once, I want it to be easy. It's nothing but work work work all the fricken time. While I know my husband would be there with us and not out to sea this time, I still have to do this crap because he's going to be starting a new job. I know it's my job as The Wife and The Mama to make all this stuff magically happen, but I just want a durn break, ya know?

I feel so old. I'm not some starry eyed new military wife looking for the next adventure. That's not how I roll. I love stability. I love knowing my place where I am. This just isn't me.

But, I have no choice. Thanks to a plummeting economy, we will have to go where my husband can find a decent job to take care of a family of five. Trust me, you can't live off a retirement check.

Right this moment, I'm just depressed/upset/sad/mad/tired over what I'm going to have to deal with in the next six months. Whatever and where ever God sends us, I'll make do because that's just what I do.

I just need a little bit of time to wallow in the pool of crap I'm in so I can get it over with, put my big girl panties on, and deal with it.

......and I quit smoking???

Busy

I think I may have gone over to the overkill side of things. Now, I'm not truly sure about this, but it's a possibility.

I know we're moving this coming Fall. No, I don't know what date exactly, but it's going to happen as sure as the sun comes up in the morning. While I have been known to procrastinate about things, this I can't ignore. When I can't ignore it? I do what needs to be done.

The Boy takes speech once a week at a private facility. He was able to get "outside" help versus school speech because he wasn't in a public 4K program. We did the referral dance and the insurance company worked with us (!!!) to get him some help. I do fear that with us moving, he will lose valuable progress while I get all three kids settled in school while unpacking a home. We'll be using a new insurance plan and I'll have to learn the referral dance all over again. Time for me to be proactive. I've talked the public school he's going to for kindergarten into speeding things up for him to be in speech. They're going to do their best to get him an I.E.P. (Individualized Education Program) established before we move so that whatever school the kids end up at, that school will recognize it and immediately get him into speech. The ball is already rolling on that. We've done our part, I hope the school follows through on theirs. Starting in June, my son will be going to speech boot camp (my words there). Two to three times a week, he will do some intensive speech therapy. Hey, it's free (as in no co pays-my husband has paid the price over and over again) right now and I want to get whatever help I can for my son.

Next week starts our family counseling. Now, that's going to be interesting. I'm not playing with this, Internets. Moving is hard. Moving your children away from their lives is hard. There is nothing easy about it at all. We are going in to therapy as a family to make sure we're all on the same page, lines of communication are open, and we're as prepared mentally as we can be. I have a teenager. Need I say more? I have a tween who is coming into herself. I have an ADHD five year old. Dude. We're dysfunctional waiting to happen. I tell everyone we go to counseling/therapy to stop the crazy before it happens. I'm all about some preventive medicine here.

Do you think all of that is overkill? It's going to make my summer weeks a little busier than I'd like, but what better time to get what I can accomplished?

I've enjoyed this week with my son so far. I get to see how much he's learned this year as we watch all the preschool shows. Before? He watched with some, but not complete, interaction. Now? He's hollering out the letters, singing along, and shaking his booty when need be. It amazes me and shows me he really got his money's worth out of PreK/4K. He talks about kindergarten every day and how he's "so excited" about going. (Here's where I cringe because he'll have to attend TWO kindergartens because of our moving-ugh.)

There's three days of school left for the girls. I do believe they're ready for a break. Although, I'm sure, by July they'll be ready to head back to the hall of learning. Paige for the social aspect and Makenna to get access to the library.

It's just an easy busy (compared to hectic busy) week here at The Edge. We have awards ceremony today, a visit to Ms. Rose, a visit to Dr. M., and a commissary trip to fit in somewhere. A friend of ours is retiring this week and we are excited to attend his ceremony this Friday morning. Add in a graduation ceremony Saturday for a friend's daughter and we're completely able to call it busy.

I like easy busy.

Easter 2009

Look what time it is again! I searched google images to see what would best describe my feelings about this very special day. I found chocolate! Chocolate is my drug of choice in life, I do believe. My hips would agree with that statement also.

It is a little sad for us because this is our last Easter in Georgia (as far as we know). We have reached that point now. Where we do something like celebrate a holiday and know this is our last in this home. I wish we had known this a year ago! I would have appreciated those moments just a little bit more. Alas, that wasn't how it was supposed to be.

We at The Edge love us some Jesus. No matter what storm we have to go through in this life, we know Jesus is a rock we can cling to til that storm has passed. Right now we're in a storm of uncertainty. Now, when The Boy blesses our food before supper, he has been asked to add a little something to the end.

He says...."Lord, please watch out for our family and help my Dad find a good job."

Matthew 21:22 states: " And all things, whatsoever ye shall ask in prayer, believing, ye shall receive." KJV

I could get a little more in depth with asking God to let us move back home to South Carolina. I have the town picked out, the desired school system and even a few neighborhoods I'd love to live in. You can't get much more specific than that, can you?

Mark 11:24 states: "Therefore I say unto you, What things soever ye desire, when ye pray, believe that ye receive them, and ye shall have them." KJV

I can only ask. God knows what I want in my heart. I know He will make the best decision in order to best look after me and my family. I am humbled by that thought.

We are excited to celebrate Easter with good friends and a good church. Good food has been planned to enjoy after a wonderful church service. Eggs will be hunted with lots of giggles and pictures taken.

I am blessed this Easter weekend. I am blessed with an amazing family that I hold so close to my heart. I am blessed that we have the freedom to celebrate our Savior's Resurrection. I am simply blessed.

I wish you all a Happy Easter.

He is not here: for He is risen, as He said.

Matthew 28:6

KJV

Things I have Learned

The past three weeks I've learned a few things about myself.

For instance, life is going to happen no matter what I think or feel. I can sit and pout or I can get motivated. That's simple enough, isn't it?

I love having "Perfect World" visions. You know where you envision how things would go in a perfect world and would just work out to your advantage with no tears- just smiles, lollipops, and rainbows. P.W. visions keep me sane some times when I get overwhelmed.

My family and I are going to survive this retirement. We really are. I don't know where we are going to end up when all is said and done, but I have faith that God knows and He will reveal it to me in His time. God also knows I'm a planner and I just know He won't let me suffer too much. Maybe just enough to be a touch frazzled and call on Him a little bit more, you think?

My husband finally gave me a tentative retirement ceremony date yesterday. It's going to be around mid-September. The date isn't set in stone, but it gives me a day. A day to plan somewhat. That date grounds me. Even if it changes, it will only be the week before or the week after. I have peace in knowing I have something to work with.

I also know my children will be okay. My Paige is a good kid. She has had to plan her classes for next year this past week. This is hard for her since she doesn't know where she will be finishing up 10th grade next year. What did she do? That girl got all proactive and looked at a couple of high schools where we *might* end up. She studied their requirements and compared them to what she can take here and finish there. She has a plan for next year for her classes. I never had to do a thing. She took care of it so that she, herself, could have peace of mind. She is just like her mother, that one. Give her a plan and she's set. She has reconciled herself with the fact that she has to leave this school she loves. I really hate having to do this to her- more than she will ever know. But, she's going to be just fine.

I have learned that I have amazing friends here where I am. The past two weeks have found me helping Neighbor Debbie with getting her homes taken care. Carla and I helped her clean the one she was leaving and we painted the one she was going to. It was back numbing work with long hours, but it's done! I would do it again in a heartbeat. That's what friends do, you know. They jump up and help without a second thought. I feel lost now, like a part of me is gone because we've been next door to each other for almost three years. Neighbor Greg had it pegged right when he said we needed to wean from each other a little bit. I have to say I agree with him. At least I can still see her on a regular basis and our dwindling group can stay intact for a few more months.

Ultimately, I have learned that I'm going to be okay. I say that now, but the closer it gets.....the more I'm sure I'll need nerve pills of some sort. I will plan what I can as I go and let God handle the rest. Now, if I could just follow my own advice, I'd be good to go!

Another round of snippets

In the excitement that has been going on, I forgot a Mama Brag I was supposed to do.

Makenna won the Young Georgia Author's Award for 4th grade at her school. I didn't even know she had entered a contest! We were so very proud of her because the story she wrote was so stinking cute. I would put it on here but I have to figure out how to copyright my blog first. I don't want her hard work stolen. They had a small awards ceremony where she received a certificate and medal on a ribbon. Her 3rd grade teacher was in charge of the program at their school and she was beyond tickled that one of "her" kids had won. I would post a picture, but she's holding her certificate and I'm not about putting her last name out on the net. I'm sure you all understand my safety precautions. Now, her paper goes to the district level to compete against the other elementary schools here. If she scores there? Then it's off to state level. That girl of mine is so creative. She has a gift that I hope she nurtures and develops...it would be a shame to waste it!

We're calming down after all that retirement news saga. There is nothing to do but go forward. We're planning what we can and flying by the seat of our pants the rest of the way. I went ahead and registered The Boy for kindergarten. I spoke with Rose and the assistant principal at the school and they both agreed that it would be a good thing for him. See, I have to get him started in speech at school as soon as I can. If I don't? It could be a month or so before I find a doctor to refer him out when we move and we're worried he will lose all his progress with a gap like that. His speech teacher agrees that we buckle down this summer and move to three visits a week- time for hard core speech therapy! He's speaking so much better as it is. Poor thing just gets so wound up and his brain kicks into 10th gear and his words can't keep up with his mind. This is not only about learning the "v", "f", and "s" sounds....it's about learning control to slow down and communicate. I am in awe every day that he has received such amazing help with truly great people.

Paige is dealing as well as she can. My heart breaks that I'm taking her away from a place that she loves and a school she adores. My baby has just blossomed like the prettiest flower you've ever seen since we moved here. I won't ever regret moving because she has truly found herself and her way. I encourage her to think of how much more she can grow in another place. Her answer? She just wants to move to Tennessee to be with her best friend who moved last summer (her Dad retired). Oh, if it were that simple, Baby Girl.

The Man is putting out his resume and is hearing from headhunters. We've decided to put the job search (at the moment) in the South East region. Hopefully, the South East has a place for us. Carla and John are job searching also. Ugh. It's like my little world here is just busting wide open. Military life can suck in this aspect, you know. You roll along living life and enjoying and, BAM, you gotta rethink and redo and just take a totally different life route. Eh, I'm too old to do this. Well, I'm too old to do this again after THIS time. I have no choice but to grit my teeth, grin, and go one more time.

I'm heading out to help Neighbor Debbie get her place straight. She leaves next week and I'm going to miss her like crazy. At least she won't be that far away and I will still get to see her. I just won't be able to walk to her house like I normally do. (I'd have to walk on the interstate to do that and I'm thinking that's on the dangerous side.) Around noon, I get to head to another friend's house for lunch. Yeah, I'm going to miss my girls. Then again....I might finally lose some weight if I don't do all the lunches! Hmmmm.......

My baby has his first T-Ball game tomorrow (if the rain holds). I went to practice last night and just know I'm going to be on of those screaming fool Mamas. I could have licked those babies, they were so serious and having the best time. You know I'll be taking pictures!

Go on and have yourselves a good weekend. Keep it steady now.

Planner

I am a planner by nature. I love a good plan. If that plan doesn't work out? I love a good back-up plan. Give me a plan and I'm smooth.

I do not have a good plan right now. I do believe it's going to make me crazy.

Rose told me last week in counseling I was a planner. I just looked at her and blinked. My reply? "And whats wrong with that?"

Nothing, according to her. It's true that when something catches me out of left field and knocks me down, I jump right up and hit the ground running. Crap on moping around about it and letting it get the best of me. I want to tackle problems head on and get them solved or out of the way.

My husband? Not so much a planner. He likes to sit back a little while and ponder things. He wants to look at the situation from all angles and consider all outcomes and better prepare himself to deal with it.

That makes me certifiably insane. I need action. I need results. Right then. I don't care if it's not a perfect outcome or solution, I just need to be proactive. Immediately.

I kid you not, Internets. In a world perfect for me? I have plans A-Z. Plans A-Z have back-up plans. Back-up plans have emergency contingency plans. I like knowing there are steps that can be taken to get me from point A to point M. Getting back to A is a good thing to know, too.

Follow me here, would you?

I think it's more like I'm a race horse. (ha ha-my overweight out of shape self as a race horse) I take off out the gate and by the time I hit the finish line? I'm whupped. Mentally and physically. Yet, my job is done and done well.

My husband? A sturdy work horse. He plods along, straight and narrow, slow and steady. By the time he's finished? The job is done and done well. Same as the race horse. He gives his all and is able to call it good.

Can you imagine the tension that brews at The Edge at times? I want to get BUSY and he's smooth and calm in our storm. Sure, we balance each other out for the most part but it sure drives me crazy.

I have to learn to compromise...which goes against my nature. I have to learn to respect his way of doing things and know that the end result will be good.

It doesn't mean I can't make a few plans in the meantime, does it? You know...just to make me feel better.

That perspective thing

I do believe I am tired of the perspective side of things now.

Last night I had to take The Man to our local E.R. He was feeling a little wonky (my word I used when things aren't right) yesterday morning. He still got up and was helping me clean The Boy's room and go through clothes he has outgrown. Around 5-ish, he made the comment that his chest was hurting.

Oh?

I asked if he was having pain in his arm and jaw. He said no, but, he was lightheaded and short of breath. I put the symptoms in the g**gle machine and decided quick like we might need to go get him checked out.

The E.R. was packed. A bunch of teenagers were there to support a friend. Lovely. We didn't wait long for triage and the nurse was very concerned. The Man was pale and he is not a pale person by nature. He was pretty much taken back immediately.

Can I say I love my friends? I started texting right away to let them know where we were and what was going on. I did this, too, so they would know the kids were at home alone and to keep an ear out for them. They texted back right away showing support. I heard terms being thrown around as the nurses moved quickly to hook my husband up to monitors, start and I.V. port, and talk a bunch of nonsense. Both Carla and Debbie were my links to finding out what they were talking about. Neighbor Greg let his fingers fly on his computer to get information back as fast as possible. I probably looked like a teenager the way my fingers were flying over my phone.

When they brought in the nitro, I got really worried. I texted (paraphrasing here): "Oh crap. They're giving him nitro!!" What did Carla do? She immediately sent out texts and requests for prayers to her mother and our friends and stood by with fingers ready to look up anything I needed her to. Neighbor Debbie jumped in her truck and headed to the E.R. for some moral support. I kept updating Paige so she wouldn't freak out but kept it low key for her.

His blood work and cardiac work up came back fine. Whewww.

Now it gets wild.

The Man has had an awful cold the past two weeks. A trip to the doctor got him some antihistamine and that was it. This E.R. doctor was asking a million questions and running tests left and right. He almost seemed perplexed to me. I am also feeling my age because this guy looked like he was 12 years old. He finally came in and leaned against the counter to tell us his diagnosis.

It appears The Man is recovering from bronchitis and walking pneumonia. (What????) He has had a horrendous cough the past week and this cough seems to have made the cartilage separate from his chest wall. OUCH.

Add in the stress from the past week and it's just not good. I'm thinking the wrestling match with the constipated 4 year old probably made things worse, too.

He was given a super-wham-a-dine dose of Motrin with anti-inflammatory to give him some relief in his chest. Add in a prescription for antibiotics for ten days and we're going to see if we can get this thing cleared up.

Of course he won't take it easy a day or two to get over this. He hasn't in the past two weeks, so why start now? He's taking a class this upcoming week that goes with retirement and he will be there. He is such a Chief.

All in all, it was a quick E.R. visit (who has those?) and we were home within three hours total.

Now, I watch him closely and make sure he's drinking enough fluids. I'm doing my best to keep him low-key. (He's sitting in the recliner doing Calculus homework. So much for low-key, huh?) He'll get this one good day to recover as much as possible before I let him go do that stuff he does week in and week out.

Yep. I do believe I'm done with all the perspective stuff. I think a few drama free days are in order for The Edge.

Alot going on

Excitement never stops around The Edge.

I had a few ideas for blog posts lined up for this week when the Navy decided to spring another one on us....or did we spring one on them? Still not clear on that one.

A detailer is a person over in Tennessee that our active duty calls to help them with getting orders for their next duty station. At least that's how I understand it. My husband called his detailer to discuss his retirement back in January and he was given the choice of November of this year to August of next year (2010). We talked about it and chose August of next year. Reason being, the kids could finish another full year of school and we wouldn't be rushed to plan a retirement ceremony and take care of all the paperwork that is involved with leaving the military.

Tuesday, The Man found out his retirement request had been denied. That happens from time to time. This was the last time. Some times there are reasons that half way make sense and other times you wonder if the detailers took their work to the local bar and tried to figure out things over a bunch of drinks.

The Man had finally reached his limit. We decided that maybe November of this year wouldn't be so bad after all.

Then the panic set in. That's not far away at all. In fact, we basically have six months to get our stuff straight and call it good.

We were up until 1 a.m. Tuesday night writing The Man's resume so he could attend a job fair in Jacksonville the next day. Time to find a job!

We are both floundering and not really sure of our footing at this time. I am slightly stressed over what to do with my children. Do I start them in school here, only to go for 4-8 weeks before taking them out and moving them to another school? Oh, the thoughts that race through your mind.

More thinking about it tells me that the girls will be fine doing that. Paige seems to think it'll be a type of torture and as much as she loves her school and the people there, she doesn't know if she can handle that stress. She may just have to. Makenna is my " go with the flow" kid. If we do that fine. If I tell her to go pack up this minute? Well, that's fine, too.

The Boy. That's my issue and heartfelt concern. I spoke with Rose yesterday at his session and told her what was going on and my concerns. She smiled and assured me that going to school for a few weeks, then moving would not hurt him. She said as an ADHD kid, he needs the structure of the classroom more than he doesn't. That means I go register him next week for 5K at his sister's school and start him on time. In a year? This will only be a memory to him....and probably vague at that. Military kids do this every day. Shoot, there's been 2 or 3 kids out of The Boy's class that have done that this year. It happens. I just didn't want it to happen to my kids.

I find myself following my husband around asking what he thinks about this part of the retirement ceremony....about putting in his resume for this company.....basically bugging the crap out of him. He wants no part of me doing that. He needs time to gather his thoughts and formulate his next plan of action. While I am full speed ahead wanting to get as much done as possible, I have not let him have a chance to grieve. He has to grieve. So, I stand on the sidelines tapping my foot and constantly checking my watch, sighing impatiently every 30 seconds.

I have yet to allow my own self to grieve. I love this town and the people who are in it. I will miss it with every fiber of my being. I can't stop and think about that quite yet because my "moment" might take longer than the time I have allotted for such a thing. Even now I'm moving on to something else because my heart started aching.

When the poop hit the fan on Tuesday, I squinted at The Man and told him: "One thing is for sure....life with you has been anything but dull." I have to say again, I'm glad I didn't get into this military lifestyle at a younger age. I don't know if I would have ended up with nerves of steel or a nervous breakdown.

Now I have to figure out how to be it all. The positive smiling face for my kids as we start yet another adventure in our lives. The pom-pom shaking cheerleader who rallies behind The Man- telling him he can do anything, be anything. Right now, I don't know if I'm capable. But, I will do it and I will do it with style and grace.

So, there you have it. Instead of 15 months until retirement, we have 8 months. Six months really, if you count him going out on terminal leave.

Crap.

And that's how we roll at The Edge. Full speed with goggles and hollering the whole way.