Oh, Internets, Miss Hope is having herself a hard time right now. I try really hard to keep the Edge light and funny so you'll come back and visit and enjoy your time spent here. There comes a time when not so much is funny and you just put it out there because you hope and you pray that someone can maybe help just a bit.
It's my boy. My sweet, beautiful, stubborn Boy. God knows I love that 44 pounds of dynamite. He is my baby and I can't imagine my life with out him in it.
He's not doing so well in Pre-K. Well, I call it 4-K and he corrects me and says "It's PRE-K, Mama!" The first few weeks were pretty decent with an incident here and there where he had issues with pushing or not listening. It's gone downhill quick. He's had THREE incidents this week alone and The Man had to go get him from school at 10:30 this morning. He has the sweetest teacher and I just adore her. I spoke with her yesterday and flat out asked her if she thought he needed to be tested for anything. Her hands were shaky and she reached out to touch my arm and said she got so nervous when talking to parents about issues like this. I put my hand on hers and told her that I was not that kind of parent. If there was an issue? I wanted to meet it head on and get it solved.
My baby is having impulse control issues mixed in with being a touch hyper. Especially when he hits the outdoors. It's like he explodes when he hits the playground and it carries on in to the class room when they get back in. He's not making the right choices. Miss Kim (the teacher) says he knows what he's done is wrong, but it appears he can't stop long enough to think..."I really shouldn't do this!" And I know this is true because that's how he is here at home.
The Man is just beside himself. We've talked and talked and talked. I've worked with kids since I was 15. I'm a certified child care specialist for ages 2 to 4. I've been in situations with children who've had problems and now I'm the parent of a child with a problem. I don't want my baby to be that kid that when the teacher sees him coming, she slumps and knows her day probably won't be a good one. He's not broken by no means. He's sharp as a tack and learns amazingly fast. Bless his heart, he has an issue and it needs to be addressed. I want school to be a wonderful experience in his life, not a self-esteem beater. He's so loving and sweet, Internets. I want people to see the good in him, not the negative.
I prayed today that God would lead me to the right person to help my baby. It seemed like every psychiatrist's office I called....no answer or machine. I got in touch with one office and the receptionist said they don't handle kids The Boy's age, but there was someone who was good who could. I got the answering machine there, but she called me back promptly her self. This woman I've never met was the most reassuring voice I've heard today. She told me she had 25 years experience with kids The Boy's age. I told her we really didn't like the thought of medication, that it scared us. She said it should! We didn't know if he even needed medication! She told me I was to quit stressing over it. WE were going to figure out what was going on in that beautiful little mind of his and WE were going to figure out how to handle it. I know I felt better after talking to her.
Due to the incidents The Boy has had at school, we have to meet with the director and teacher tomorrow. ~sigh~ But, I have a plan of action in place. I'm not going in blind. I will keep an open mind and my eyes open to possibilities and solutions. I am The Mama and I can love that baby like nobody's bizness, but I am not educated in the areas he needs me to be. But, I will be before all is said and done. I can promise you that much.
I was speaking with Em via I.M.'s tonight telling her about the situation and I said I am in the perfect place right here for the support I need with this. I have friends who have children with issues and their support and sympathy has literally lifted me up. Instead of beating myself up wondering what I've done wrong or what I could have done differently.....I can focus on going forward and helping my child from this day on.
I'm going to use my little corner of the Internet to share my son's struggle and hope that it might help someone else. Even if it's only in a small tiny way. Because no matter what happens in life...you can choose to gripe, moan, and complain...or you can turn it into a blessing.
I choose the blessing.